My Mom took Leia to the vet this morning while I still slept. I awoke to my mom walking into my bedroom telling me the good news: Leia had a blood test this morning and she is cleared from having heartworm any longer!!! I always thought that a heartworm diagnosis was a, “Game Over” for a dogs but I’m so happy to say that Leia, “Grabbed her guts” and pulled through!!!
This whole ordeal was pretty heart wrenching to witness! I texted Sean the good news:
I’m really excited for my Mom though. She will fall right back into taking Leia for a walk easily! She grabs the leash, puts a mask on (for my protection) and goes for at least two, sometimes three walks a day! They told my Mom to start small and gradually increase the length and duration of the walk so she walked all the way down the block today.
I saw an Olive Garden commercial today and this song they played showing shots of their food was Selena Gomez!!! Is this how it is now?! That song came out when I was in adult! I AM SO OLD!!! I don’t think Selena was talking about food. Just sayin.’ I didn’t think I was THAT old but I’m a little over six months away from 40 so…
Sean texted me this morning at about 9:30 with a song suggestion. I set my phone to do not disturb when I go to sleep so did not wake up until about 1 o’clock but when I did, I listened to it! That sentence made me sound super lazy but that’s not the case because my sleep schedule is so messed up was having had a mess for 20 years!
I had a conversation with Sean some years ago, he was driving and I told him that music these days is not good! I told him that I am old now because I prefer listening to music that I listen to when I was growing up and when I was a young adult. He sent me this song using our Apple Music account. This is the song he sent me:
I listen to the song and told him that I liked it. He said that it sounded like the stuff I used to listen to and he thinks that I might like it. I really did like it but my Mom did NOT! I don’t know if you are familiar with this song but I have a listen:
I think it’s pretty cool that Sean and I can share music! He’s known me all of his life so he knows what I like and I really like that he made this suggestion.but I think I just LOVE him!
Okay, I had my MRI in the beginning of the week. It has taken me until today to process it enough to write about. Bear with me because it’s a little bit difficult and I may ramble a little.
So, my MRI was finished and my Mom had successfully let me know that there is, “No Espace” between us. The tech directed us to the elevators and told us what floor to get off on because we were in the basement. When the doors opened, my Mom stepped out of the elevator and looked down the hall to the left and then to the right. We were in another long hallway and I had no idea where we were.
My Mom took a few steps to the right and then told me that she knew where we were. I followed her for a couple turns and then I saw the chapel and I gasped.
I gasped because it became apparent to me why my Mom knew exactly where she was! My Dad spent so much time there! My brothers and I would refer to my Dad staying in the hospital as, “[Him] going to the spa” because he had so many short stays there.
I continue following my Mom and then we made another turn and were at the hallway between the west entrance and the main entrance. I looked at the floor and specifically the tiles. The tile work is 20 years old. I know it’s 20 years old because I had Sean when it was being completed.
I went to the emergency room downtown because I did not feel okay and when I called Saint Mary’s Hospital where I was supposed to have Sean, they told me since I was only 32 weeks pregnant that they were not equipped to care for me and the baby if necessary.
I was admitted to the hospital downtown early on November 1 and I had Sean on November 2, 2001. I stayed in the hospital with him for a few days and then I was discharged but he was not discharged until December 3rd.
My Mom would drop me off in the morning on her way to work at about 7:15 in the morning and my Dad would pick me up after his work at about 430. I would go home (to my parents’ house), eat dinner, and then go back up to the hospital with Sean‘s dad until about midnight. I spent the entire time rocking and glider in the NICU across from Sean‘s incubator. I was only allowed to hold him for 20 minutes a day. I never held Sean in the morning and kept the time for when his dad came up to the hospital. After a while, the nursing staff saw that I was so dedicated that they told me that I could hold Sean as long as I, “ kangaroo cared.” After they told me that, I would do that until I got hungry.
I utilized the west entrance when being dropped off or picked up because I still was not able to drive that soon after my C-section. I would see that hallway everyday and watched the man slowly and meticulously put the tiles down. He was still doing it when Sean left for the final time in December. I remember that when I would see him carefully putting each tile down I thought of a movie from my childhood:
I remember those little things fixing the tiles to the apartment entrance. They placed each tile one at a time like that man did 20 years ago at Henry Ford Hospital.
So, all of these memories were brought the forefront of my mind. I had my MRI on T -10 and today is T- 6. In six days, it will be 15 years since my Dad‘s death. I was quiet and quite contemplative on the ride home. When I got into my house, I took my sweatshirt off and saw the cotton ball and tape they put on my arm after they injected me with the dye for contrast for my MRI. I Took the tape off, saw my arm, and I started to cry.
Sean and I were recently talking about The fact that he always used to take my Dad‘s bandage off of him when he came home from dialysis. They would work together and my aDad would tell Sean to take off the bandage slowly. I was shocked that Sean remembered that Because he was so young back then!
When I awoke the next day this is what my arm looked like sis, which is a sad commentary on our times:
I thought of how many MRIs they give a day and they can’t even afford higher quality tape?! I have to go back to the hospital in a couple weeks for my Swallow test. I’m a little nervous about that one!
It’s been a minute but I think my YouTube feed refreshed and I was able to see this video:
Maybe that’s what it’s doing, just posting videos that I have never seen before of songs that I love so I get to enjoy them! At least, that’s what I’m telling myself! I love you so much, Bono!!!
So, I had my latest MRI on Tuesday. It was a neck and brain MRI. I had never had an MRI in the downtown hospital so that was a new experience for me. It was in the basement. We were told where to go and after we wound through a bunch of hallways, we reached Bay 1 where my MRI was going to take place.
Laila told us to wait for a moment because somebody was using the machine. So I’ve written before that my Mom comes with me to ALL of myself medical appointments. Tuesday evening, I completely remembered why that is!!!!
We were directed to a room well I was going to have my MRI. There was a small gurney where I would lay down to be pushed into the machine. Two young women technicians were there as my Mom and I came into the room. When we entered the room, my Mom surveyed the situation as one of the technicians asked very politely, “ how can we help?“ I looked at my Mom and she made one statement. She said, “Just stand there and watch.”
I immediately heard Bruno Mars in my head:
I think the women were a little bit shocked but they didn’t say anything and marveled at how well my Mom transferred to me. This was further proves that there is no espace between me and my Mom! The MRI lasted almost 2 hours and when I came out of the machine, two young guys were there and Laila who is running the machine was there as well.
My Mom easily put me back into my wheelchair. There were two male technicians when she did this and because I was laying on a sheet and would slip off the gurney easily, she told them that I have no core strength and to hold me which they did!
I have more to say about my MRI experience but I’m still processing that but I thought I would share that my Mom is the best in the world! One of the men holding me in place on the gurney said something about how well my Mom transferred me and she responded that she does this every day! Because she does! Multiple times!
I had an MRI last night and I’m still processing evenys from that time before I can write about it. But, one thing I can write about pretty easily is that as I was going down the long hallway that I have been using so many times over the years. She was on the opposite end of the hallway and as I was coming down the hallway and we approached each other, she smiled and asked me a question.
I was wearing my Michigan sweatshirt (The one without the bleach stain on the arm) and she smiled at me and asked, “Is that football or basketball?” as we passed teach other. She was referring to my sweatshirt and I kind of laughed and gave her the best and most honest answer I that could. I called to her over my shoulder and just said one word, “Both.”
I am quiet as I am getting ready for my MRI tonight at Henry Ford Hospital Downtown. This song is in my head and I miss the person I used to be before MS, doctor’s appointments, and medical testing:
I feel strange but it’s NOT like they are going to tell me I have MS or anything…
