Author: Jen Rios

“What Takes the Place of Climbing Trees and Dirty Knees in the World Outside?”

So, my Mom watched a video and this song was playing, and I started to cry. I remember that Ms. Kneffel (she was the piano player for the plays) just before my graduation asked me if there was a song I wanted to sing for the ceremony and she would play it for me.

I thought about it for a moment, and I told her, “Ms. Kneff (that’s why I used to call her) I can’t sing for it, I will be a blubbering mess because I will be too emotional. Thank you, but I can’t do that.”

In retrospect, I should’ve just sucked it up and tried my best to sing it because I didn’t know that I would lose that ability as I have now.

My Mom told me that we should watch this movie and I stayed silent because there was a lump in my throat. It just hits differently now for me. You know, being a teacher annd all with a short stint that I was.

It’s really bothering me that I can no longer sing. I can still feel the air filling my lungs as I belted words out, but I can’t do that anymore. Additionally, I used to sing that song with my cousinT Shannon in her basement when I was like 17.

This is the Day.

Okay, my chair broke on May 24. On June 24, Dewan came and adjusted things on the back of my chair so I could move my legs, but it still was broken and still hesitated upon moving forward or backward.

Today, July 10, Dewan picked my chair up to get it fixed So I didn’t need to rent a van and this is what I think:

He said that he will have it back here well before 5. He arrived to my house at about 9 o’clock and that’s usually when my Mom gets to NSM. Previously, when my chair has been worked on, she’s usually home by 2 o’clock.

With the utmost gratitude, I am most thankful that because of my supporters of my GoFundMe account, I can pay for these repair repairs!!!

1°

Yesterday, I realized what a difference 1° can make. My Mom told me that she was cold so I told her to turn the air off. That was a big mistake! Without the the air blowing, it heated up to 72° which proved to be too warm for me and I was lethargic. My Mom asked me if I wanted to go to sleep and I shook my head and that’s when I knew that I needed the house to be cooler.

It took a little while, but then I could see straight again.

it kind of stinks that it has to be like this for me now, because my ribs shake now when it’s cold:

I would much rather be cold than overheated. 1° makes a huge difference!!!

Win, Win, Win!!!

Today, I watched, Across the Universe and when it was over, it was the beginning of, Nine lives of Christmas on the Hallmark Channel.

So, I thought it was a win, win, win because my power came back at 9:02 p.m. today:

We (I say we, but I mean my Mom) talked to Jane at K and B and she said that we will need to get our generator serviced because it’s been used for three full days.

I’m so grateful for the generator!!!

Updated

So, the power is still out in my area. I received a text saying that the power would be restored tonight at 11:30.

I just. got an email today saying that my estimate had been updated and it’s not going to be restored until July 6 at 11:30 p.m.

I am so beyond grateful for my generator!!! I am comfortable sitting in my house. I am not phased by this update because I have power. We cannot run the washer and dryer and my Mom is a little upset about that but I told her that the air-conditioning is much more important so we’ll just have dirty clothes?!

I don’t leave the house physically until July 15. Dewan is picking up my chair on the 10th To get repaired and will bring it back fixed before the end of the day.

My Mom thinks that my next-door neighbor has a generator as well because they have lights on. I reminded her that she told them about the generator last summer.

My JAM in High School

I got super uncomfortable this evening and I couldn’t understand why. Until I checked the weather and I could not believe that it wasn’t still 95° at like 7 o’clock. This heat is horrible!!!

My house is probably around 75° even though it’s set at 70°. I am just trying to endure this heat wave! I watched Voicemails for Isabel again today. That’s my fourth time and I think I’m understanding a little bit more, meaning that I can see everything a little bit better. I do that. I watch the same movies over and over again. My eyes take a few I can really get what’s going on.

After seeing it so many times, I get what’s going on. I NEVER planned on being in my homebound life, but this is how it is. Sean watched it with me for a little bit today when she bought the food truck. I remember that song was my JAM in high school!

I could sing along a little bit because I know all the words, but I can’t sing anymore. My lungs can’t handle that anymore and it’s too warm for me to bust out my breathing exerciser to work on that.

I absolutely LOVE the ending bridge, “I love you, I miss you…” I still remember belting that one out! It sucks that I can’t anymore. Maybe in the fall, I can bust out my lung exerciser breathing tube thing and maybe it will come back. but if not, I still have my memories… those have not really faded that much. It’s kind of painful for me when you think about it…