I have been listening to this Sara Bareilles song every day for a long while! I only listen to it when my Mom is taking Leia for a walk because she says it is depressing.
for me, it is NOT depressing! It actually is autobiographical. I saw this picture on Facebook not too long ago and it made me think of this song because for me, that girl really IS gone but she used to be mine!
My Mom is out taking Leia for a walk so you know what I am listening to and I am lost in memories of being able bodied…
And somehow, I am comforted with this song in this moment of sadness.
I have since reconnected with a high school friend and we talk football all of the time! Right after the Stafford trade, I told him that I already bought a jersey for Sean. I told John that he hast to wear this for me because I love Matthew Stafford!:
That picture was taken in the summer add my nephew’s graduation party. I knew that was going to be a good investment! Well, I didn’t KNOW that it would be but I knew that I would always LOVE Matthew Stafford!
I was on the fence about becoming a true Rams fan in the beginning of the season and as the weeks went by, he told me that he is sorry but I already AM a Rams fan! He lives in Texas and he sent me this for Christmas:
I talk with one other high school friend who has not been a believer in Matthew Stafford ever and I constantly defend him and put faith in him for the next season!
So the game started and I was flying high with tons of, “Woos” to go around and lots of clapping And, “ I love you Matty!” My Mom had left to go to her house so I was alone to watch the game. I was having a great time until the second half started after I received this text but I already knew it so I was nervous:
And then I received this text from my other friend:
I
And then the game ended and all was well! I texted my Barwis trainer, Adam, (who I called Phil). I had previously sent him my Facebook profile picture where Matthew Stafford won his first playoff game. I actually watched Monday night football with Adam one night at Barwis and so he witnessed firsthand May, “I love you Matty!” Shouts!
I texted him this about Sunday’s game:
And he responded to me with:
My friend texted me this fact that he saw in a twee later in the evening:
And then I share that fact with our other high school friend:
And then I sent him this and here is his response:
I really can’t believe that this is happening! Well, actually I CAN believe it but I really can’t! Then I saw the Tweet from GMFB today which made me happy!!!
What's your opinion of Matthew Stafford after beating Tom Brady and the Buccaneers❓❓❓@KyleBrandt – "This is what we've been waiting for with Matthew Stafford since he came out of @GeorgiaFootball!!" pic.twitter.com/GhlvUjsGwt
I am excited because I have never had a horse in the race this far into the playoffs but I’m happy to say that I am consistent! Sean gives me a lot of junk for abandoning the Lions but I told him that I have always been a Matthew Stafford sand and then I’m consistent! I treated this to him after the Game because he KNOWS that I love him!!!
My friend told me to call her husband and talk smack to him about Matthew winning but I was so tired yesterday but a good way!
I clearly remember hearing this song playing in the background as the announcers were talking while I was watching the Cardinals v Rams Wildcard Game. I thought that I would write a blog post about this song because it was so random that I heard it. I remember being 11 years old and buying this single tape with my OWN money because I liked this song so much! It was $2.99 and I felt it was totally worth it because I had my own tape player and I could listen to it endlessly, which I did!
I just read on Facebook this morning that Meatloaf has died. I feel kind of morbid posting this today but I have been thinking about this since that game and I figured I’d share it now:
Very shortly after I joined Facebook (20 years too late), I, “Friended” and “Liked” their page. They are: MS Memes and more Multiple Sclerosis Awareness. There wasn’t a Multiple Sclerosis Awareness month when I was first diagnosed. It was about 10 years after I was diagnosed that there was one week in March. I have posted many pictures about my T-shirt sales back when I was working. Now, the ENTIRE month is dedicated to Multiple sclerosis Awareness!!!
Oh, I am aware of it every second of every single day for the past 21+ years!!! MS Awareness Month is approaching so I have been receiving a lot of posts from them in my Facebook feed. I feel special that they chose March to be that month of recognition because that is ALSO my “Birthday Month!” I saw this meme yesterday and have thought about it since:
When I read this meme, a song immediately popped into my head by India.Arie. That took me back to my college days when I was still driving and was just on crutches.
I reposted a blog post from 2018 because it talked about a poetry slam I did when I was in school for my African-American studies class. I listened to that song and stayed in my memories for a while. I listened to this song before I am about to post it and I revisited those same memories and seem to be there right now:
I have been seeing my speech pathologist for a little over a month now. Because of the pandemic, our visits are virtual. I meet with her every week for about 30 minutes. We talk on the phone. She originally had lists of words for me to read which progressed to sentences and now she sends me articles for me to read for us to discuss at the next appointment.
Yesterday, she told me that she wants me to call her work phone and leave a message. She wanted me to leave text messages. The first message is an unedited and then I can edit the message because that’s how I am! I told my Mom last night about the text messages I was going to send her but my Mon reminded me that her neighbor sends her audio messages because she cannot spell well.
Because I have been using my voice to text capability for so long on my phone, it has gotten used to how I sound when I say things. It even texts the word, “Abuela” because I use that word so much when I text Sean. I left Meira two audio messages. The first message was 24 seconds long and the second message is 28 seconds long. I think she will leave me a message tomorrow to tell me if that form of communication works. I can’t get over how difficult speaking is for me now! I even cried yesterday at our appointment because it is SO difficult now! She has told me that overworking the muscles in my jaw will help me to speak better for longer.
She has told me that I am doing very well and I think it is good that I use my voice to text capability when I blog on my iPad as well. That’s another reason that I try to post daily. I will let you all know what she thinks of my messages tomorrow or whenever she answers me?
I didn’t text with any of my friends while I was watching the game last night because it was a little bit nervous!!!
today, I received a text message from my friend after sending him this::
He texted me this question:
I am not sure, it’s possible but I thought of this song immediately:
I usually will have my pic for the Super Bowl winner by now but I am not sure. I know what my heart wants but I don’t know if that will come to fruition. So, I am definitely going to watch the game next weekend an active realist on this one!
Since the beginning of the pandemic, I have become a more passive football fan. My Mom moved in with me and I know that she is NOT a football fan! Last season, I just checked the scores on my NFL app. But then, my man changed teams!!!
This season, I HAD TO watch his debut in SoFi! Because the Rams are doing so well, and are in the Wildcard game tonight, I will be watching the game at eight! I told my Mom I’d like to say that I was going to do this. I am so excited to see this came! It’s his playoff debut!
I am so excited to see this came! It’s his playoff debut! But if the Rams lose tonight, I think I’m going to be more of a passive fan during the playoffs. I can’t even eat my normal Super Bowl food anymore!!!
so, right now, I am watching the Golden Girls marathon until pregame starts! I had a good feeling about Matthew Stafford being the quarterback of the Rams so I planned accordingly:
So, yesterday I felt a bit wonky. Probably because I am not doing well with dealing with my disease progression. 21 years seem to be a little bit much for me! My Mom had laid down for a nap so I was going to watch something on TV. I turned the TV on and just saw the opening scene of this gem! This is my ABSOLUTE favorite Hallmark movie!:
Subconsciously, I compare ALL Hallmark movies with this one! `
Think I like this scene the best because it shows that they belong together! They got married
This was the first movie that I was watching that Sean commented on wondering what it was about. I have been watching the same movies over and over again for his entire life! I don’t know why thought it would be different! He commented on it when he was headed to his room and he turned his head to say something to me at the same time that I begin mouthing the song he was singing in the movie. I love the words that go along with this scene in the movie and her name is Sarah in the movie and her favorite ice cream is mint chocolate chip ALSO!!!
And they have belonged together the whole time!
I love these are the final scenes with them getting married!!!
I don’t know how many times I have seen this movie but I’m sure it’s somewhere around 200 or so…?:
I had a difficult morning today! I was going to write about the fact that I am afraid of it and I do not like my, “New normal.” It seems that it’s taking me longer to wake up and move around and be coherent and that scares me. Things are becoming more difficult for me to accomplish. That really stinks!
I made my way to my living room still not feeling well but I knew that I needed Chapstick. I started laughing once I looked at what I will now call my, “Bag of Chapstick.”
The memory is a little hazy but I remember two students being close to my desk. One of them knocked some things off of my desk and the other student somehow exclaimed some thing about, “You dropped her bag of lotion!” I had never heard that before but I laughed kind of a lot! As I laughEd, he said, “Well, that’s what it is! And it really wasLet me explain:
I think it had to be The winter of 2007 or 2008 and my disease had just begun progressing into things that I didn’t even realize but now I know. What was happening in the winter of 2007 or 2008, (well, really BOTH of them!) What is that my hands would get really dry and when it was cold, they would subsequently crack and eventually, they would bleed. At that point, it was clear that I do not like heavy lotions on my body or even my hands. so, my hands would be dry most of the time and in the winter months when it was cold, they would crack and bleed. Sometimes it would start as early as mid October and would go until late February.
to counteract my dry hands, I went to the health food store that say would buy my organic things from. They had a bunch of different lotions and I told the sales person to tell me the lotion to use if I do not like the feel of lotions on my hands. They showed me the specific one and allowed me to test it. It was really light on my skin and I bought one. It was kind of pricey. Hey it had a strange packaging to it, it was shaped funny. it was a hard plastic tube that opened from the bottom and it was shaped kind of like a ball just before the opening and then it had a thinner handle Toward the end opposite of its opening.
I think I had left the tube in my car overnight so it cracked and I wasn’t done using the lotion yet! I put it in a Ziploc gallon bag and just let the lotion seep out inside of the bag. It WAS very expensive on my single mother, teacher’s salary. I had to make it last! It was the only lotion that felt good on my skin. retrospectively, that probably wasn’t the most sanitary option. I use that lotion for a long time but I didn’t buy another one until my hands cracking and bleeding again became a problem. I went back to the store and bought another lotion to deal with my hands that were dry and bleeding. I was in a different classroom then and it was extremely cold in the winter in there. The lotion cracked while I was teaching in the class. I was close to the kitchen in the cafeteria and I got another Ziploc bag to put the cracked lotion tube in.
Now that I no longer work, my hands do not crack and bleed in the winter anymore. I am not out in the elements very often these days. I really appreciated that today that I was able to remember a fond memory from my teaching days and that amused me! Now, I am on a fixed income but I would not say that the chapstick was “Extremely pricey” like the lotion was but it’s more of a “Principle of the matter” for me. Now that I no longer work, I finish chapstick completely! I have posted pictures of completely used chapstick tubes on my blog before! So, even though it wasn’t pricey, I HAVE TO finish it! I remembered my, “Bag of lotion” so now I have a, “Bag of chapstick.” I am almost finished with this tube anyway. I dropped the cap yesterday and I think it rolled under my TV stand for the cable box.
