Author: Jen Rios

My chairtopper was still broken so Dan came out, got my chair out of my trunk, waited as I transferred, and pushed me in.  He pushed me to the chairs and I waited for my time.  Mike came over and told me that Matt was on the blue table and that we would work on the white table.  I groaned and told him that I didn’t like the white table.  He pushed me over to the tables.

I looked at Matt and jokingly told him that he, “was messing with my mojo again!” and we both laughed.  He moved from the blue table to the white table.  Score!  I would have a good showing now, I thought.  Mike put me on the table.  Now, basically, I hug him (with my arms around his neck) and he kind of lifts me onto the table and kind of lays me down.  Changing positions makes me dizzy so I hold on to him for a second for the room to stop spinning so I can put my left and then my right hand on the table to let go and sit up.  Something was different this time though.  He had his right arm bent instead of straight and he and Deeds were talking.  My eyes were closed and I was trying to compensate for the difference I felt and I told Mike and Deeds to, “stop talking!, I’m trying to concentrate!” as I held on to Mike trying to make the room stop spinning.

It wasn’t and I was holding on to Mike for what seemed like a longtime so I let go, fell back onto the table, put the heels of my palms firmly over my eyes, and waited as the room continued to spin.  Mike always jokes how I hold on to him for so long and I tell him that it’s because I have a Neurological Disorder and then I tell him that he likes it.  The room will then stop spinning and we get to work.

This time, after he kneaded my calves and knuckled my thighs, I was able to do 5 knee raises on each leg (Thanks Matt for allowing the return of the blue table!) then Mike had me lay back so he could stretch my legs.  He stretched them like I was sitting like a man so I could take this pic because it was “Wacky Sock Wednesday”:

He stretched both legs so my butt REALLY hurt and then he put me back in my chair and took me to get my jacket and out to my car.  He had difficulty getting my feet in AGAIN and I asked how i felt.  He said, “Good, until I try to get your feet in [the xar].” Well, I guess that’s good…?  Slowly but surely…

My chairtopper broke on Saturday so my wheelchair was stowed in my trunk. I called when I got to Barwis and Deeds came out to get it from my trunk and I could transfer on my own so I told him that was all I needed so he went back inside. Then Dan came out while I was transferring and he pushed me inside.  My right knee has been hurting and my right hip felt weird over the long weekend.  I guess it makes a difference when I don’t come to Barwis  for a long weekend.

Matt was on the blue table so Mike put me on the white table. Adam and I used to work on the white table all the time. It was weird though, it felt foreign. I didn’t like it. I guess I have been so used to using the blue table. When I sit on the blue table, my feet can touch the ground. My feet don’t touch the ground on the white table, just my toes.  Mike kneaded my calves and knuckled my thighs and I told him about my right knee hurting.  He had me do five knee raises with my left leg.  I did those pretty well but I could not lift my right knee with just my toes touching the floor to start.   So this time, my legs weren’t even. I guess my right leg was really my “poop leg.”

Mike had me lay on my stomach which was weird because the white table is skinnier than the blue table so he spotted me so I didn’t fall off the table as I flipped over.  He stretched my hips so I was finally able to lay flat on the table.  He bent my feet backward to get the stretch for my quads. There is a mirror on the wall beside the white table so I could see just how far he was bending my legs back.  It was pretty far. Almost touching my butt. It felt good to see because I really HAVE made progress. Mike put me in my car and he still kind of stinks at getting my feet in.  Progress is slow and being on the white table feels weird now.

The doors to Barwis were open when I pulled up so Dan was outside and he pushed me inside after I got out of my car on my own. I pushed myself to the chairs and waited for Mike to come get me when it was my time. I pulled up my pant leg and showed Megan my sock. It was “Wacky Sock Wednesday” and I liked my socks.

They had a Phoenix on each of them.   I sat there with my eyes closed while I waited because I was a bit tired. Mike would look over and periodically tell me to, “Wake up, Rios!”  I would open my eyes and tell him that I wasn’t sleeping and then close them again until it was my time.

Mike got me and pushed me to the blue table. He put me on it and I told him that I felt tight. He kneaded my calves and knuckled my thighs and I watched Megan work with Garrett.  He was standing and taking steps with Megan. Megan’s hands were on his hips and his hands were on her shoulders. He is a good six or 8 inches taller than her and it looked a bit silly. Mike and I cracked jokes about them being at a dance and we all laughed. I watched Garrett move and I said, “I want to walk.” I didn’t say it to Mike but it just slipped out of my mouth unconsciously. Mike looked at me and asked if I wanted to walk just as Megan and Garrett were. I reluctantly declined because I knew I wasn’t feeling strong enough.

It saddened me that I declined but I did not want to be disappointed and based on how I felt, I knew trying to walk would end up being a disappointment to me… For now.  I lifted my knees 7 times each and laid back as Mike stretched my legs out to loosen them up.  It feels nice when Mike stretches my legs out especially when they feel as tight as they did on Wednesday.  I look forward to the day when I can take steps easily. In the meantime, I just have to be patient. I really stink at this patience thing just like Mike stinks at putting me into the car.  But then again, one day, (hopefully soon) he won’t have to.

Megan pulled me in to Barwis.  Mike came and got me when it was my time.  He pushed me to the blue table and put me on it.  After coming to Barwis for almost 21 months, my guys know when they can push it and when they have to take it easy on me.  Jesse knew it, Phil knew it, and now Mike knows it.  Monday was one of those days.  What I especially like about these days, is that they still are productive.  I remember Phil telling me that EVERY day I come to Barwis that it is productive.  I remember not being able to see it when he told me this some time ago but I see it now.

There will be days when I feel miserable but I’ve known that I just have to get through it.  Every day isn’t as HORRIBLE but there are days that are.  When I come to Barwis, I know I will sleep well that night.  I am NOT walking yet and that doesn’t seem to frustrate me as much as it used to.  I know it my soul that it WILL happen eventually and I am working tirelessly to make it so.  At times my trainers have to work harder than I do (It’s difficult to stretch me out!) but they see walking in my future too and they let me know when I ask (which is often).

I’ve learned, or I AM learning to focus on the good things regardless of how small they seemingly may be.  It’s the simple pleasures, man.  I lifted my knees up as I sat on the edge of the blue table 10 times each (AFTER Mike pinched my knees OF COURSE!!!) Instead of being discouraged, I focused on the fact that I am progressing and I am not going to be upset that it is SO SLOW but appreciated that in addition to getting movement in my legs, I got a GREAT stretch and a good night’s sleep even though Mike STILL kind of stinks at getting me smoothly into my car.  So, I can bask in the simple pleasures… at least for now.

I was late to Barwis on Friday. There was some weird traffic thing on Telegraph connecting onto the I-96 freeway and I was stuck there for like 20 lights or something  so I was late.  I called when I got there and Mike came out to get me. My legs were still a little bit wonky from Monday’s stretch but I was feeling a little bit better.  Mike pushed me in, to the chairs to drop my jacket off, and to the blue table.  He kneaded my calves and knuckled by size. He said that I felt looser then I did previously in the week.  He had me lay back and he stretched my legs a bit. Then he had me sit back up and on the edge of the table.

He told me that I was going to lift my legs like I did on Wednesday. He pinched his fingers in the air and said that he still had his magic. So, he pinched my knee and I started moving my knee up. I did two sets of 5 for each leg. Now, last time, I asked if I had moved my knees 500 times because I lifted them a lot!  He kind of laughed and agreed that I lifted my legs 500 times. Now, this time, I swear I lifted each leg about 1000 times!!’  Actually it was only 10 but I did it so well, it felt like 1000!  It felt really good! I jokingly told Mike that when I am walking, I will need him to pinch my knees so I can get some of his magic before I go anywhere.

He had me lay back again and folded my legs like I was sitting like a man and he pushed that stretch a little bit.  The end of my time approached and I was tired but my legs felt good. Mike put me in my car and I looked forward to sleeping in on Saturday morning. I am not walking yet but I feel that it is coming soon and it is progressing. I said before I will wait for it and I will.

Mike came out to get me from my car because I couldn’t transfer on my own.  I called inside and because it was 5:00 already, it was my time to be with Mike so I knew he was available.  He came and helped me transfer to my chair (my muscles were still a little weak from Monday’s stretch).  Mike pushed me in and to the chairs so I could drop my jacket off.  As he pushed me over to the blue table, we passed Megan (she was working at the white table) and I pulled my pant leg up to show her my socks.  Just after Mike put me on the table, she ran over to show me her socks.  I told her to take a picture.

I tweeted it right after Barwis on Wednesday.  I told Mike about having to call-in to work on Tuesday and how it was a bummer that I couldn’t be there because it also was our Literacy Luau/Book Fair that I am the chairperson of!  He had me sit on the edge of the table and had me lift my legs up.  Before I started, he pinched either side of my kneecap and told me that it was his “magic hands” that would make it easy for me to lift my legs.  It was!  I gasped it amazement/excitement and we both laughed.  Megan said the socks were the reason I did so well.  Mike tried it out.  He didn’t pinch my other knee and he told me to lift my leg and I couldn’t.  So I didn’t want to test it any further and wouldn’t lift my leg until Mike pinched my knee.  I asked Jesse if this was similar to when Phil and he would press my muscles to get them to activate and he said that he wasn’t sure.  Mike had me also lift my legs “up and out” as well with the knee-pinch and I did just as well and I didn’t overcompensate too much with my upper body.

Then he had me lay back and he stretched my legs SO gently.  It was a nice stretch and I kept thinking of that Maroon 5 song because it was the “sweetest” stretch.  Maybe I was just hoping to see a video with “curly-haired Adam Levine”  It’s not but I LOVE this song so that is why it was popping in my head.  I’ve seen Maroon 5 in concert twice but they only played this song once.  When Mike took me outside and we were getting ready for the transfer back to my car I asked him how many times I lifted my legs and he told me 6.  He told me that he didn’t count my “up and outs” because I was killin’ it!  I’ll agree with that.