Author: Jen Rios

So, I went back to work on Tuesday.  It was tough and my knee still hurt but with my compression socks on (it’s cooler outside now so it’s more comfortable to wear them, it’s too uncomfortable in the summer), my knee brace, and the extender for my wheelchair, my knee felt a little less cracked open.  I was a bit hopeful when I went to physical therapy on Wednesday.  I told Kristen that my leg felt less cracked open and I looked forward to it not hurting one day.

The fact that hurt less made me feel better.  It still hurts but maybe it’s getting better.  Neither me nor Kristen watched This Is Us this week so we figured that we’d have more to talk about next week.  She worked my knee and I told her about Brad’s knife.  I really appreciate being at physical therapy because, at this moment, I really felt that it WAS getting better.

I had my stim.and the ice and Kristen taped me up.  I told her again that my knee felt less cracked open and I wished it felt MORE less cracked open and we laughed and she agreed that that was the goal.  I wasn’t going to be able to come to therapy on Thursday this week because of scheduling conflicts but given that I felt a little better, I wasn’t too worried about it.  But them it rained Wednesday night into Thursday morning…

I saw Brad on Monday and I figured it out; my knee feels cracked open.  It hurts so badly but I am scheduled to go back to work on October 18th.  That’s tomorrow.  I told Brad that my knee feels cracked open because that is EXACTLY how it feels.  Before Brad started working on my knee, he took the octopi or jellyfish off that were still on my knee.

My knee felt better as he worked on it.  He came over with this instrument that looked like a knife.  I asked him he was going to cut my leg off.  He laughed and told me that it’s called a Graston instrument.  It helps him rub out my leg.  It really looks like a knife!:

Those aren’t my legs but doesn’t it ok like he’s going to cut off her leg?! ???. It may look that way but it made my knee feel better.  The stim. and ice continued to made my knee feel better and then Brad taped my knee.  He put, “Two Stars” on my knee.  One on either side of my knee.  Luba called it a, “Flower” the first taping but it was the same taping.  I think, “star” is more masculine. Either way, it felt good!

I worked with Luba Thursday and told her that my knee is hurting on the outside.  My MCL is feeling better with the taping and that was what was strained in my injury.  I didn’t understand why it was hurting so badly on the outside of my knee cap.  It REALLY hurt!  It had almost been a month since my injury but maybe it hurt because my MCL was feeling better in comparison.  Luba looked thoughtful and maybe a little confused.

She told me that maybe I was over-compensating with the outside of my knee.  She also pointed out that since I am knock-kneed, that might affect the healing process.  I have ALWAYS told people that I have the world’s ugliest knees because I do.  My knee caps face inward a bit so my legs are funny shaped. Luba pressed the outside of my knee to see where it hurt.  It hurt EVERYWHERE!  It hurts like a letter “C” cupping my kneecap.  Luba told me that it was my “IT band,” she would work on that, and she would tape my knee differently to help with the pain.  She also told me that they had blue tape now.

Gerry would use blue tape sometimes, pink too but Kinesio tape is usually black.  I’d REALLY dig purple!  After she worked my IT band, placed the patches for stim, and put the ice on, she went to the table behind me.  When my stim time was up, she came back with what looked like blue octopi in her hand.  She had cut the tape in to strips but left it uncut at the top so I told her they looked like blue octopi.  It wasn’t until the next morning where I noticed that there were a bunch of these “octopi” and rather they looked Ike jellyfish from SpongeBob SquarPants.  My Dad used to watch that show ALL THE TIME with Sean when Sean was little.  My Mom and I think that show is dumb but Sean swears that it is, “Quality TV” to this day!  It makes me think of my Dad so maybe it does that for Sean too.

Wednesday, I worked with Kristen.  My Mom asked her the other day if she was watching This Is Us. I had told my Mom about the show and I ABSOLUTELY LOVE it!   Kristen watches it too so we can talk about it after I told her how my knee was feeling.  She asked me what I thought about Brad because he was new so wanted to get my opinion.  I really dug him!  I told Kristen about the pain on the outside of my knee and while she worked on my knee, we talked about the 3rd episode of This Is Us.  

 She worked my knee and it feels good when I’m at ATI and then it hurts when I’m not.  Turns out that Kristen just got engaged too ??? so she’s getting married also!!! She placed the stim pads and put the ice pad on.  I wished my knee could feel like this ALL THE TIME and I wondered how long it would take to feel better.  Then Kristen came over with blue tape this time, it was black before.

She taped the inside of my knee where my MCL is and it felt supported. She then taped across my kneecap and I visualized it holding my knee together and it felt good.  The tape coupled with ice and stim is truly a winning combination! Until my knee feels better, at least Kristen and I can talk about This Is Us.

With ATI having a new space, they hired a new physical therapist.  His name is Brad.  I worked with him on Monday and will periodically for my time at ATI for my knee.  I liked that his name was Brad and I remembered telling the other Brad (the one in OT school) about wanting to name my son Brad.  At that point, I had only known two “Brad”s in my life and they both were GREAT men!  Mr. Flint was my Lifestyles  (religion) teacher in high schooi.  He washed my feet in class around Holy Thursday, (I’m Catholic at it was like Jesus before Easter) I was one of the few students who volunteered for that because I didn’t care about being bare-foot in school.  He told me that my feet were, “small.”  The second GREAT “Brad” was my cousin Shannon’s friend.  Sean’s dad didn’t like the name and asked about “Sean.”  I told him that was okay if we spelled it S-E-A-N.  That was the “correct” Gaelic way to spell it as my family priest told me.

I liked working with Brad.  We had easy conversation the entire time he rubbed my knee out about ALL KINDS of stuff.  He’s getting married in December! Something I noticed about my knee is that the outside of my knee is hurting.  I told Brad about this and he worked it nicely!  Then my time was up and it was time for ice and stim.  I’ve been at ATI for a while but my knee STILL hurts so I can’t really see myself leaving.  I miss working hard at Barwis but this hurts!

I kind of feel like a sissy STILL complaining about this but it is a CONSTANT throb!  The pain I feel in my knee is like the pain I experienced when I was recovering from surgery.  I’ve said before that knee surgery hurts more than having a baby (I should clarify that I had a C-section) but it does!  I forgot how much knee surgery hurt until experiencing the pain I feel right now.  Brad wrapped the inside of my knee up and it felt really good!

I worked with Luba on Thursday.  I told her that my knee feels SO good when I’m at ATI but it hurts SO much constantly when I’m not at ATI.  I was injured on September 21st and it had been MORE than two weeks and it still KILLS!  I told Sean that I feel terrible about talking smack about NFL players being out with knee or ankle strains.  I didn’t have a 300 lb. man run into my foot but my knee hurts like CRAZY!  Luba thought about what I told her and told me that she would tape my knee to help with the pain.  It was called, “Kinesio Taping” and she would do it.

I told her that my physical therapist from 10 years ago used to tape me foot.  I was on crutches then and he said it was something new he was learning.  He taped my right foot to help me with the “drop foot” I was experiencing and to keep me on my crutches and walking.  (So, I guess my right side has ALWAYS been my, “Poop” side!)  It really helped and he did it each time I went to physical therapy after I broke my ankle.  Then my Dad died so I stopped going to therapy as my Dad was laid in state at the funeral home.  I remembered that my therapist, Gerry, and another therapist, Christen, showed up at the funeral home to tape me.  I was surprised to see them both there and Gerry told me that he was there because I needed to be taped.  Christen held my foot and Gerry taped me.  I hadn’t thought about this for a while but I recalled it with fondness as I told Luba about it.

After my rub and stretch, they have a “roller stick” too.  Luba rolled my right quad a bit to help with my knee pain.  Their “roller stick” is different and has a row of little metal balls that feels good when it’s rolled on my leg.  I told Luba that their “roller stick” is better (than Barwis’) and she smiled and jokingly told me that she would tell them.  After the ice and stim she taped the inside of my knee.  She overlapped different pieces of tape in a circle and told me that it was, “Just like a flower.”

My Mom helped me transfer from the table back into my chair and Luba asked how it felt.  I smiled and cupped my hands and put them together, palms together and I told her that it feels like my MCL is being cradled!  It felt SO good!  I was excited that my knee could feel better and we left.  For the first time since September 21st, my knee kind of felt better!

I worked with Kristen on Wednesday. I will be at ATI Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays for the next month.  This was the first time I worked with Kristen at the new ATI and my excessive rambling continued.  First, I explained to Kristen how I was injured and how much it STILL hurts!  I am trerribly surprised how much it hurts but Kristen rubbed my knee differently than Luba did but I tell equally as good!

My rambling continued and I started talking about Sean and football.  Then conversation changed to the movie, Concussion with Will Smith.  She had also seen it and I told her that I  ordered it OnDemand and watched it by myself.  I wasn’t sure where Sean was but I remembered him coming home when I was already in bed for the night.  I called him to my room and asked him to come close to me where I tearfully had him lean close to me where I could kiss his forehead.  He was taken aback by me doing this and asked why I did it.  I told him that I just blessed his brain and told him that I ordered Concussion and he could watch it the next day if he wanted.  He asked if it was going to make him NOT want to play football anymore and I thought for a moment and told him, “Maybe.”  He didn’t watch it.

Kristen finished my stretch and rub-down and put the patches on my knee for stim and put the ice on.  I always take a deep breath with my eyes closed because it feels SO good!  As I laid back, I wondered if I was always going to ramble when I was at ATI.  Hmmm.  Probably.

The last time I was at ATI was awhile ago.  When I was there, the therapists talked about moving to the space next door.  Construction actually started when I was there and they told me about it being a bigger place.  I found it a little difficult to picture and I wondered what their current space would look like.  They told me that Mike Barwis was turning it into a yoga studio.  I remember the new ATI opening and I saw video of the old ATI space.  I often looked at the new double doors on the far side wall of Barwis and wondered what it looked like.  I didn’t think I would end up there again and kept telling myself that I should go check it out.

Well, as my luck would have it… I was injured.  My right knee.  After an emergency room visit, two days off of work, a visit to Saturday urgent care and referral to sports medicine, I got in to see Dr. Frush.  I sprained my MCL.  I told him that it hurt and I thought I was just being a sissy at first but I knew something had to be wrong with my knee.  I had had knee surgery on this knee before, I had broken my ankle, I bore a child (via C-section), and I had braces.  Not to mention that I’ve had MS for almost 16 years; I was NO stranger to pain.  He said it would be painful for 4-6 weeks to come.  He was NOT lying!  He prescribed a brace and physical therapy; so here I am back at ATI, the new ATI.

it is a lot bigger and there are more tables and a large space for people to do their work.  Luba told me that there are 5 physical therapists now.  It still smells like new paint.  I dug it.  I dug it even further when Luba started working on my knee.  I hadn’t really realized how much my knee hurts until Luba rubbed it and made it feel so much better!  I’m scheduled to come to ATI, 3 days a week until November 10th.  I COMPLETELY need it!  But I HAVE TO enter through the back door so I come in to ATI through Barwis… I still HAVE TO see the guys!

I laid back on the black table, tired.  I had had “Open House” at my school and one of Sean’s football games so I was unable to go to Barwis.  I was there again and happy to be there.  It was mellow and there was just the new semester’s group of the “Fit Club” (not a full class this time), Nick, Deeds, and me there.  Me and Nick chatted it up a bit while Deeds sat on the table to our right.  He was messing with his phone to change the music.  Nick told him to, “Turn on u2, Deeds” and gave me a small smile when I jerked my head to look at him.  The music stopped for just a moment before I heard the opening bars of “Pride.”  Now, u2 is my ultimate, favorite band and all the guys at Barwis (past and present) know this but I know it’s NOT really Barwis music.  It’s not, “Pump-You-Up,” workout music and I KNOW this.  Deeds played it just for me.

I recounted the singing of this song at the TOP of my lungs in the bar with my brother on my 22nd birthday.  (My Dad was taken to the hospital and started dialysis on my 21st birthday so there was NO partying that day!) I know I’ve told Adam and I’m pretty sure I’ve told Michael about it too.  Nick continued stretching me and we continued doing PNFs as “Where the Streets Have No Name” came on.  I KNOW this isn’t Barwis music!  But, I REALLY dug it.

Lastly, “One” came on as Nick was helping my Mom get me into the car.  Now, this song FOR SURE is NOT Barwis music but is my FAVORITE u2 song if I had to pick just one.  I love SO many of them!  As we pulled away, the fact that I heard 3 u2 songs played just for me made me feel SO special!  I’ve worked with Deeds once, the 2nd time I came to Barwis when Jesse, “Stood me up” but Deeds has always been there when I am.  The few times he’s been sick or on vacation in the past 3 years, I miss him.  I remember I told Jesse that ALL of the guys at Barwis are not so much like my brothers (because they didn’t torture me when I was little) but they are!  Deeds playing this music for me solidified that fact even further for me!  I love ALL of them!