12 Years

Today, this morning, wasn’t any different from yesterday. However, I sat in my wheelchair and put Good Morning Football on.   I took my time to put my contacts in and wasn’t really paying attention to the TV. I stared off into space and tried to gather some strength. My Mom brought over my garlic tea because it was warm and I drink it every morning.

She made Cream of Wheat and even though I had my contacts in, I could not get warm. She brought a blanket over to cover me and I ended up reclining in my wheelchair and falling back to sleep. I just did not feel well!

I am not sure how long I slept for but I slept so deeply that I even started to dream. My Mom and I were at a movie theater with Sean between us and he was small, probably about three years old. I thought this would be a dream about Happy Feet because that was the first movie we took Sean to see and there is a funny story surrounding it.

That probably will be a story I wrote about at a later date but as we sat in the theater, over my right shoulder, I heard my Dad!

I had a dream where I saw and heard my Dad speak just after he died. I haven’t heard his voice in 12 years! My brothers sound like him and even my son will say things like him but they’re not him!  I didn’t know how much I missed hearing his voice until I heard it! He was calling my Mom.  He said, “Mary Ann” twice. It was the unmistakable tone of his voice that is just the tiniest bit different than my brothers or my son.

I’ve never heard my Dad call my Mom by both of her names but as I recounted the dream to her she said that he did sometimes. Usually when he wasn’t happy with something she had done. She  said it in the exact tone that he used in my dream. She totally knew what I was talking about! She told me it was an authoritative tone and almost sternly. That was exactly what it was!

When Sean got home from school, I told him about it and had wistful tears in my eyes and a smile on my face. I was so excited to have had that experience and, “encounter”  even though I did not see him, hearing him was just as good!  It had been so long since I heard him and now, I am so grateful to have had that experience and his voice is re-etched into my memory now. I  was so good to hear him and I am SOgrateful!