Category: Barwis Methods

My Mom got me out of the car and I met Nick just inside Barwis.  He pushed me over to the blue table, wiped it down, and worked my legs as I sat in my chair.  He said that my legs felt looser than they did on Monday.  Megan came by while I was still in wheelchair to show me her socks.  It WAS “Wacky Sock Wednesday” #24:

I had the “Hamburgler” socks.  Nick helped me on to the table and he worked my left leg and Heather worked my right.  The stretch was a little intense but I understood that it would be a little rough only for a little while, then my legs would loosen up.  Heather had me lay on my stomach and had me do some PNFs.  I didn’t realize until Nick came back with the harness that I was squatting.  But I didn’t squat on Monday so…

Heather held my feet as Nick pushed me to the Keiser machine.  I did 3 sets of squats for a total of 45.  Nick was happy with my progress.  I started squatting with 100% air but I ended using 80%.  I pointed out to Nick and Heather that I MAY have done better because I was wearing a “Michigan’ shirt opposed o my NORMAL “Squatting Shirt” (my Central shirt).  Nick half-smiled a chuckled a little and Heather told me, “whatever I need to believe.”  Nick told me that he liked doing less reps with not as much air and fist bumped me as I finished.  I was a little tired but put my arms up and, “Woo”ed on my way down the ramp.  Madison was walking by and heard me and laughed.

My Mom was in the front part of the facility talking with Elle and picking up my “1% Day” shirts.  i got one for my Mom, Sean, and me.  My Mom liked her shirt partly because it’s for Brock.  She knows how much he is an inspiration for me and walking.  When we left, she helped me into the car and she said that my legs were REALLY loose.  My hamstrings hurt a little Wednesday night and today and my feet felt REALLY hot last night.  Sean put an ice pack on them and rubbed them a bit as I was falling asleep.  He laughed because my toes were twitching really fast.  It was a little uncomfortable as I fell asleep but I haven’t even FELT my feet in SO LONG so It made me EXCITED!

 

Friday, my left leg was VERY swollen.  It kind of hurt on Thursday but I LOVE the feeling of sore muscles – especially when my legs are sore because I haven’t felt my legs in SO long!  But, the pain I felt on Friday was just too much.  I had to call Elle and unfortunately had to cancel my appointment.

I was REALLY bummed about this fact and it discouraged me.  Then I came across this tweet:

@Motivate_Us_: Every setback has a major comeback.

I favorited and retweeted it.  I’ve thought about it and I don’t know how long it will take for me to comeback but for now it’s a setback.

So, I cancelled Barwis on Friday because I was in pain.  My left leg hurt and was a bit swollen.  I figured it would be better or Monday… I was WRONG.  My leg was EVEN bigger!!!  Sunday night, my brother, Dave, came over and instead of making fun of me for having such a swollen leg, he was concerned.  My Mom had been concerned all day.  Now she had an ally and I was outnumbered.

I woke up Monday morning after elevating my legs ALL NIGHT and they were STILL swollen.  My left more than my right and my left leg was bruised.  I texted Jesse and Mike Barwis to find out what they thought.  I sent them pictures of my elephantiasis legs (my Mom took some pictures.  I am NOT putting them in this post because they are PRETTY GROSS!!!). Mike said it was probably a pulled hamstring because that is where it hurt the most.  Jesse agreed and Mike suggested that I see an orthopedic doctor.  He was out-of-town but he called me and told me that he was going to have a doctor’s office call me.

I called Elle and told her that I wasn’t going to make it Monday.  That fact bummed me out.  It was such BAD timing for a FURTHER setback!!!  My legs were VERY swollen and I spent the day with my legs elevated alternating ice on both of them.  The doctor’s office called and I have an appointment Wednesday morning.  I guess the comeback isn’t coming as soon as I had hoped.

I had an appointment at 7:30 Wednesday morning to get my left leg checked out; it still was swollen and it hurt.  Mike Barwis referred me to this doctor.  He wasn’t just ANY orthopedist.  He is THE orthopedist who works with the Detroit Pistons.  I was shocked that Mike made a phone call and the doctor could get me in SO quickly.  I was nervous about my leg because it was STILL swollen.  My brother’s and my Mom’s concern compounded that nervousness.  There was one other person in the office when we (my Mom drove me) got there.  I

I laughed to myself because there were “normal sized” waiting room chairs and sprinkled in, there were “super sized” chairs.  I told the receptionist that it was pretty cool that they had chairs for tall people and she told me that they have a lot of Six-footers come through.  I was scheduled to go to Barwis later but it seemed unlikely that I would go there but I wore wacky socks anyway!

I chose the red and blue stripes because I WAS going to see the Pistons’ doctor.  Now, this was the first time since high school that I wore shorts out of the house.  I HAD to wear shorts so the doctor could see the swelling and discoloration in full effect.  I wondered if he was going to comment on my ACL reconstruction scar (he did).

After we waited for a little while, I told my Mom that she should sit in the BIG chair.  She did and her feet were like a foot and a half from the floor when she sat back comfortably (she is even SHORTER than I am!).  We both laughed.  I laughed about it ALL DAY!!!  Then I was called back.

I made my way into the room with the nurse in front of me and my Mom behind me.  It was a normal patient intake and I’ve been in orthopedist’s offices before having torn my ACL and having surgery, having broken my ankle, and having Sean having broken his arm.  I went for X-rays and shortly after I came back in, Dr. Frush came in.  As he sat down, he said, “So, Mike Barwis referred you?”  I felt my face light up as I smiled and said yes because whenever I say that to my neurologist, he doesn’t know what I’m talking about.  Then, Dr. Frush asked, “You’re with the First Step Foundation?”  Two for two!  Yes I am!  I felt so good hearing this because he knew ALL ABOUT Mike and the work I am doing to walk.  I felt validated and that felt REALLY good.

Dr. Frush told me that I need to get on the table so he could examine me but it came up to my shoulders like the black table at Barwis. I looked doubtful at the table then he told me that he has a movable table down the hall.  We went down the hall, he lowered the table, I got on, and he examined me.  He left to look at my X-rays.  I felt good that he OBVIOUSLY knew what he was doing and it felt good that I was getting it addressed (at my Mom’s urging).   I didn’t know that I would feel the BEST when Dr.Frush came back.

When Dr. Frush came back, he said that I have a partial rupture in my hamstring but that my muscles looked good and felt good and that I will make a FULL recovery.  He said that I am “an excellent candidate” for the aggressive work that Brawls does to get me walking.  Hearing that made me feel REALLY GOOD!!!  Dr. Frush ordered physical therapy for me and knew the therapist by name who works next door to Barwis, a compression sleeve for my left leg, and an ultrasound to rule out blood clots in my leg.  He said the ultrasound was necessary because he can’t see the range of motion because my legs do not move normally at this point.

I went down the hall and got fitted for my compression sock and my Mom dropped me of at home where I called ATI (the physical therapy office next to Barwis) to make an appointment (it’s on Friday).  Dr. Frush told me to NOT go to Barwis this week but that I can resume Barwis next week.  When I went to the hospital to get the ultrasound, two women asked me if I was a professional.  I didn’t understand what they were asking but I think the coding on the orders and who it came from, got me immediately seen.  The ultrasound was good and I didn’t have any clots.  The tech told me that if I did, I would be admitted to the hospital.  Luckily, I wasn’t.

I texted with Mike Barwis all day and told him that I felt like a VIP the entire day!  I know that it is ENTIRELY because of him.  My problem was taken care of and my faith in Barwis Methods has only been solidified.  Dr. Frush told me that Mike does GREAT work, I already knew that but it was REALLY nice to hear!!!  It was great to hear that I am exactly where I need to be to get walking. Mike and his team do exactly that and it’s just a matter of time for me.

I have been coming to Barwis for 2 years and I have never been inside ATI.  it’s the physical therapy office INSIDE of Barwis.  I’ve seen all of the physical therapists in the gym doing various things but I never had a reason to come inside… Until now.  Dr. Frush told me about it and told me to see Nicole.  I called Wednesday and was able to get in to see Nicole on Friday.

Nicole reminded me of a friend and colleague whom I have worked with for the past 10 years.  We had easy conversation and she pushed her hair behind her ear just like my colleague and that made me smile to myself.  Nicole rubbed my leg out (it was STILL puffy and my hamstring kind of ached.  She told me that my muscles felt good and that made me feel really good!  Hearing it from Dr. Frush AND Nicole felt REALLY good! I don’t hear good things about my muscles very often so to hear it twice was spectacular!

Nicole did some stim on my leg as well.  I vaguely remember getting stim on my knee during rehab after surgery.  Nick Lucius was there and it was strange to see him NOT at Barwis but at Barwis.  He couldn’t tell me what ATI stood for so I will have something to ask Nicole next week.  My Mom showed her pictures of me squatting with the harness.  She asked if I used to do squats unharnessed (she saw me back when I could do them).  I told her my PR was 46 and 70 harnessed.

She told me that I won’t do squats for awhile which bummed me out and she told me that she would talk to Nick about how I should workout there until my hamstring heals.  It is SO convenient having my PT (physical therapy) and Barwis in the same place!  All of this just solidifies in my mind that being at Barwis is EXACTLY where I need to be.  I will go to Barwis AND PT next week.

I was scheduled for physical therapy at 5, was running late so rescheduled for 5:30.  We get to Barwis (my Mom drove me) and we parked in one of my normal spots around back.  My Mom went to get my chair from the trunk as Deeds was in the gym walking by.  He saw me and waved and I felt something strange in my chest that I didn’t quite recognize but smiled and waved back.  I got my feet out of the car with my Mom’s help and Dan came out to the car to help further.  He put me in my chair and as my Mom pushed my through the gym to physical therapy I realized what the feeling in my chest was,  I’m going through withdrawal not seeing the guys at Barwis; I miss them!  I saw Mike Morfitt and even Mike Rhoades but just said “Hi.”  I talked with Dan for a second but had to get to therapy.  Barwis has been part of my routine for SO long!  I haven’t been there since the 22nd of July.  I missed it.

My Mom pushed m e into ATI and I see Nick Lucius.  I smiled and he told me that he was working with me.  Oh yay!  My 2 worlds (Barwis and ATI) overlap!  Nick stretched me out had me do some PNFs on my left leg and he put some stim on my leg.  My leg was tired and my hamstring ached.  It’s different to have my leg ache like this.  I’m used to sore muscle ache (it feels good because I can FINALLY feel pain in my legs) but the pain I feel in my hamstring is more of a painful ache.  Originally, I planned to go to therapy and to Barwis right after.  I have since amended that with Elle.

But, I was excited to come back to Barwis on Wednesday.  As my Mom was pushing me through the gym to the car, Mike Morfitt came over and met us just before we got outside.  He asked me what happened and I told him that I tore my hamstring but assured him that I would be back to Barwis on Wednesday.  I told him that it was weird not being at Barwis and I told him that I even had to wear shorts and that I haven’t worn shorts since high school.  He agreed that my legs were REALLY white.  I laughed and I went outside and he went back to what he was doing.  Nick Lucius put me into the car.  Before he picked me up, I warned him that, “I’m a BIG girl” and he replied, “I’m a BIG man” and picked me up.  My leg was tired but I was excited to be back working at Barwis the next time I was here.

I was BEYOND “Jessie Spano” excited to be back at Barwis.  It had been TWO WEEKS to the day (AND it was “Wacky Sock Wednesday”) since I had been there to work with Nick.  I believe that has been the longest stretch I have been away since I have started coming here two years ago.  I used to think a week was WAY LONG but two weeks was just TORTUROUS!  I waited by the chairs and Nick came over to ask if I was here to see him.  I nodded and he pushed me over to the blue table.  On the way, Mike Morfitt came by to give me “five” and I told Nick how Mike made fun of my white legs.

We got to the blue table and I told Nick all about my hamstring and I told him how it STILL hurt.  Nick stretched my legs out gingerly.  He told me that it (my hamstring) was too bad because I had just started squatting again.  He helped me on to the table and my stretched my legs out by crossing my them across my body.  I had my Mom take this pic of my socks for “Wacky Sock Wednesday” #25:

Then he had me lay on my stomach and I did some PNFs. My legs were tired!  I didn’t work my hamstrings but REALLY worked my quads.

My Mom put me in my car because I was SO tired!!!  I fell asleep on the way home.  It was like my first summer working at Barwis, when I used to nap after I worked out.  I’d wake up from my nap with TONS of turf pellets in my bed.  I noticed turf pellets on the table when I was laying on my stomach.  I was disappointed with my setback but I KNOW I will comeback from this setback.  Just have to wait for it.

I went to ATI opposed to Barwis again on Friday.  I was working with Greg.  I had seen him many times while I was at Barwis so I already felt comfortable with him even though I had never worked with him.  He asked about my leg and how Nicole and Nick had worked with me.  Nicole and Nick had worked my leg while I sat in my wheelchair but Greg said that he preferred to work on me on a table.  I was comfortable with that having had Parker work on me for a few years while I was on a table.  My Mom transferred me onto the table and Greg tried to stretch my legs straight out.  Both of my legs (my left more than my right) wanted nothing to do with that.

Greg talked about the tone in my legs.  I’ve heard that word a lot lately but my Mom asked A LOT of questions.  Tone is the stiffness in my legs that resist movements that people (ATI and Barwis) want my legs to make.  My legs used o be able to complete these movements naturally but now it is so much more difficult to mimic these natural movements.  It’s frustrating that this is happening but I attribute it to the progression of my disease.

Greg told us what ATI stood for, “(Athletic a and Therapeutic Institute”) and showed my Mom how my leg had relaxed by him massaging and stretching it.  It MOST CERTAINLY did and it was really nice!  He put the stim patches on and iced my leg.  He told me that it was most likely the tone in my legs that resisted against the movements that tore my hamstring while I squatted.  That was a bummer to hear but it made sense.  I told Greg that I worked so hard that I tore my own muscle.  That sounds pretty hardcore!  It stinks that MS has caused all this tone in my legs and consequently my torn muscle.  Yeah well, MS sucks but I am fighting against this degeneration every time I am at Barwis (and ATI for the short-term).  I will go to therapy twice a week and to Barwis on Wednesdays(GOOD THING I won’t miss “Wacky Sock Wednesday”)!!!

I arrived to ATI for therapy and I worked with Nick.  I remained in my wheelchair and he REALLY worked my left leg.  He told me that my tone was better and that made me feel good.  The tone has been concerning to me and to hear that it was better was promising.  I am working with my doctor to remedy it naturally at this point.  I hope I can come to this resolve in the near future.

Nick was pleased with my showing in my muscle strength at that made me feel good too.  We talked about the slow progress I’ve made.  It HAS been slow and I spoke of “Nay Sayers” who I seem to be surrounded by.  I take A LOT of solace in the fact that EVERYONE at Barwis believes that I will walk again.  Nick told me that there will be hiccups.  I told him that this (my torn hamstring) was a big hiccup.  Nick told me that I am mentally tough enough to take this and talk about my transition from a wheelchair to crutches.  This conversation and him being pleased with my leg’s progress was what I needed.  My hamstring hasn’t ached painfully during the day.  It did last night after physical therapy because I worked it.  I can take that!

Another thing that I needed happened when I finished at ATI and my Mom pushed me out of the door and into Barwis’ gym.  Deeds caught my eye and waved to me.  I smiled and waved back just as Megan (who was a little further away) waved also.  I returned her wave and Nick (who was nearby) waved and came over to ask how my leg was.  I gave him a thumbs up and smiled. All of this (my hamstring) may be an unwanted hiccup but it also has allowed me to appreciate my Barwis family which is PRICELESS!!!

Elle had called me Monday to push my time back on Wednesday.  I pulled up to Barwis and my Mom was on the phone so I started wheeling myself in the rolldown door.  I saw Mike Morfitt and talked with him as I pushed myself up the ramp.  I hadn’t done that since a little bit before I tore my hamstring so I struggled a bit.  Connor was also coming in the door so he pushed me just inside.  I looked to my left (where the blue table is) and to my right and I didn’t see Nick.  I wheeled to the door that separates the front desk from the gym.  I pushed it open with my footrests and then got stuck.  I laughed to myself and luckily; Elle saw me and came over to help me.  She agreed to look for Nick as I was able to turn around.

I wheeled to by the chairs as Elle went the other way to look for Nick in the break room.  I took a deep breath to breathe in the ambiance.  It had been 1 week since I had been to Barwis to workout and I missed it.  I don’t remember which song was playing but I remember the smell!  It smelled like it ALWAYS has – like turf and hope.  Just then, I see Nick waving his arms by the blue table out of the corner of my eye.  I rolled over to there and he asked how my leg was.

He stretched my legs carefully while I sat in my chair and stretched me equally as carefully as I laid on the blue table.  It felt good to be stretched out but I  wasn’t pushing myself SUPER hard.  I watched as Garret walked all the way from one end of the gym to the other.  Nick told me that he was a quad.  I thought all along he was a para so his strides are that much more impressive to me now!  I’m GENIUNELY happy for him but get a a tinge of sadness (or longing) because I WANT TO do that!!!  My Mom took this pic because it WAS ‘Wacky Sock Wednesday” #26:

Nick put me in my chair and my Mom wheeled me outside.  As I was about to get into my car, I heard my Mom say, “Hi” to someone so I turned my head.  It was Mike Rhoades.  I used to call him Michael.  (He didn’t like it – but I did it anyway).  We talked briefly and I told him that I tore my hamstring.   I told him that it hurt and I can FEEL it.  I’ve gotten used to the “trifecta of pain” (butt, quads,  and hamstrings).  But this wasn’t a “sore muscle” pain but a “hurt”pain.  He agreed and said that anyone who tears a muscle says it hurts.  My Mom helped me get into my car and I was tired because I hadn’t worked at Barwis for a week but quiet and couldn’t quite figure out why.  I miss Jesse and Phil.  I KNOW that but I don’t see them.  I told Mike that him leaving hurt my heart (in jest going along with the playful banter we always would engage in) but I guess it really DID and seeing AND talking with him made me realize that.