Author: Jen Rios

Yesterday, I was hoping for a good showing at Barwis.  After Friday’s work, I felt REALLY good.  Throughout the weekend I was standing taller which I believed would translate to a good show on Monday.  Turns out, on Monday, I was discombobulated.  Mr. Curl was NOT at work yesterday so I had to get myself into my car which took a little bit longer.  Traffic might have been heavier or something but the hour-long drive to Barwis was a little bit longer coupled with leaving work just a bit later made things even worse.  I FINALLY get to Barwis and Phil and I have to go to a different station because the Keiser machine was in use. Now, I am a creature of habit so running late (I HATE to be late) AND working at a different station equals me being discombobulated.  On top of that, my left leg was acting weird and it kept bending up and I wasn’t quite sure why.  I would get pain in my toe and then my leg would react by coiling up.  It took awhile for me to figure out that I had cut my toenails in the morning before putting my socks and shoes on so I was figuring that I must’ve cut the nail too short and that was why it was hurting.

Anyway, time to stand.  First is ALWAYS the worst but on my second attempt my right leg took the lead and was straight with my foot flat on the floor and it was supporting me because my left leg was still acting crazy.  I stood and it felt good.  I would stand until my left leg’s shenanigans would prove to be too much for my right leg.  I have called my right leg my “poop” leg throughout the duration of working at Barwis and I know that that leg will give me problems because it ALWAYS does.  But NOT yesterday.  It was doing what it was supposed to!  I sat after one of my stands and told Phil that it would be nice if BOTH of my legs were behaving at the same time.  But that was NOT the case yesterday, my foot was REALLY starting to hurt!  I am not sure how many stands we did but my right leg did well on each stand.  I even got into my car mostly by myself!  Phil “joystick”ed me but it didn’t count!

When I get home, I took my shoe off and expected to find my sock all bloody (that’s how badly it was hurting!) But there was no blood.  I took my sock off to discover a kind of  hang nail on my second toe.  That’s  why it was hurting!  I remedied the problem and as I was I thought that it hurt SO badly because I could feel that the nail was  getting snagged on my sock.  I could FEEL it.  It has been SO long since I have felt anything on my feet.  But now I can.  Wow.  It STINKS that I had a bad showing at Barwis for such a STUPID reason but I guess it wasn’t such a bad showing because my right leg showed me that it knows what to do.  So for “Walking Wednesday” I hope I get “combobulated.”  Which reminds me…

STOP READING PHIL BECAUSE THIS IS WHEN IT GETS STUPID BECAUSE I AM GOING TO TELL ONE OF MY “HORRIBLE” STORIES.

Phil has told me that he has read most of my blog “except for the stupid parts.”  In addition, he says that I tell “horrible” stories.  I know he is COMPLETELY joking with me and we laugh about it but he really doesn’t like my stories.  I tell him that they are pieces of me (to which he sings that Ashlee Simpson song in response) but he still thinks my stories are horrible.

Anyway, here comes one right now:

Sean had to be 5 or 6.  We were living in our second apartment at the time.  Now, anyone who knows my son, knows that he is somewhat scattered at times.  He has been this way since he was little.  Crayons and legos or whatever he was playing with end up scattered all over.  Shoes untied.  I would constantly tell him “you’re all discombobulated!”  Now, I love him dearly, but he’s a hot mess!!!  Anyway, we were coming home from somewhere and I pull into my space in our car port just outside our apartment and I turn the car off and take the keys out of the ignition.  I call over my shoulder, “Come on B, (my nickname for him) we’re home.”  He is seated in his booster seat and he says kind of frantic, “Wait, I have to get combobulated!”  I smiled to myself and looked over my shoulder to the back seat and I see two socks, two shoes, ( he ALWAYS took his socks and shoes off in the car NO MATTER what season) various snacks, figurines, and books scattered all over the back seat.   I got out of the car and opened the back door and began helping him gather his things.  I said, “Now son, I Love your deductive reasoning here.  Discombobulated is a big mess so combobulated has to mean order but combobulated is not a word.”Today, my son and I will occasionally say “combobulated” and smile a bit because I’ve shared this story with him numerous times.

So, with Monday behind me and my toe nails NEATLY clipped, I hope that I get “combobulated” enough to have a GREAT “Walking Wednesday.”

 

Curl put me into my car after work yesterday.  He did 3 squats while holding me.  I told him that I will have to tell Phil about it.  I got to Barwis a little bit late and Phil razzed me a little bit.  It was Friday, so the mat and the plyo boxes were out and I knew what we were going to do.  Phil had me lay on the mat for the stretch.  Of course, I started groaning because it hurt and Phil started saying, “Shhh.”  I asked him if he was starting that again because I have told him that somehow that doesn’t soothe me.  Yesterday, I was really diggin’ the music at Barwis.  All of the trainers control the music with apps on their phones and at the start of every new song, amid my yelps of pain, I asked who was controlling the music.

After like the fourth time asking and like the millionth time I was gasping and yelping in pain Phil told me to, “Shutty-Uppy.”  And I started to laugh.  I asked him where that came from and he explained r his sister-in-law, Maria, started it and that his Mom tells him that all the time.  I asked him how to spell it and said that I was going to spell it with an “ie.” He told me that it was spelled with a “y” and gave me a “duh!” look. Okay, it’s HIS word; I’ve NEVER heard it before.  Another GREAT song came on and I explained why I really dug that song.  Phil said, “You know, you are being Chatty McChatterson instead of being Ms. Shutty-Uppity.”  I laughed and explained that there were good tunes on the radio and then the stretch was over.

Time for the hard part.  The kneeling.  Phil explained which muscles I needed to squeeze and it was on the third one where a switch was flipped.  I thought about what Chris had said to me SO long ago about new pathways being set.  Yeah, I think that was what was going on here!  I was excited!  I still had to have the UTMOST concentration but I believe that when Phil told me to stop holding it and I can sit back that from that point on, I gracefully sat back on my heels instead of collapsing down.  I could be COMPLETELY wrong about this because I don’t know what I look like but I am going to say that that is how it is now.  It sounds better.

When we were done.  Phil brought my chair over and lifted me off the mat and did some fancy-shmancy maneuver to place me back into my chair.  He told me that was impressive and I told him that Curl did three squats while holding me.  I don’t want to start some “Strong Man” competition.  Both men are strong and Phil is SUPER strong.  Yesterday, I knelt 10 times for 30 seconds a piece.  Except for the last one.  Phil said that I held that one for 1 minute.  The mat was positioned so I could not see the clock.  So I knelt for 5 minutes and 30 seconds!!!  I got into my car by myself yesterday as well.  Phil told me that I did a good job and put his fist out.  I hesitated wondering if I could grab it tight enough, hold it, and yell, “Joystick.”  I didn’t think I could but in my hesitation we did the weird “hand-clasping” thing until Phil forced my hand into a fist and shook it yelling, “Joystick.”

I REALLY feel that a switch  HAS been flipped.  Last night, even though I was tired, transferring was easier and I felt that I was standing taller.  Even today, as I sit and write this post, I feel that I am sitting TALLER!  My butt STILL hurts but I’m okay with that.

Tuesday, I had somewhat of a fail in getting into my car after work.  I undershot sitting in the driver’s seat and was on the ledge of the door instead.  I tried hoisting myself up into the seat to no avail.  I ended up calling the school to have someone help me out.  I told Mrs. Berrocal to preferably sent out a “strapping man.”  Mr. Wright came outside and we both started laughing.  He told me that he would help me but was going to take pictures first.  We laughed even more.  I told him how he could best help me and he did.  After he got me fully into the car, he asked if I was hurt.  I responded, “only my pride.  It’s shattered right now.”  He waved his hand dismissively and shook his head.  I then was all set to drive home.

I thought that this was NOT a good sign if I was expected to walk on Wednesday.  So much so that on Wednesday after work, I asked Mr. Curl to put me into my car.  It’s already been established that he can lift me with ease so I was not THAT uncomfortable.  I refreshed his memory on how best to put me into the (like Phil does).  He lifted me out of my chair and did 2 squats while holding me before he put me into my car.  We talked some football and then I left.  My time at Barwis was pushed back until 7 so I stopped home to drop off my things from work and to see my son. It rained on and off and my body was tight.  I thought that was another NOT good sign regarding “Walking Wednesday.”

As I drove to Barwis, I could feel my body relaxing and that made me hopeful.  I got in and Phil stretched me at the Keiser machine.  He wanted me to stand and set my feet.  First is ALWAYS the worst but I hoped that the second would be better.  It TOTALLY was!  Phil even had me do two squats with which I *BINK*ed afterward.  He told me to head over to the turf.  I asked him somewhat in disbelief, “Really?!” and he told me to stand again.  I stood wonderfully with a *BINK* and he told me to stand on the turf the exact same way.

My first down I could NOT get any steps off.  I sat down again.  Phil told me to put my crutches on the ground and I slipped my arms out of them and threw them.  He meant for us to go again immediately but I misunderstood him.  He gathered my crutches and I stood.  I got 8 yards.  My 3rd down, I got 5 more yards.  I told Phil that it was, “T minus 4” until we take our #DaisyandPhil Take 2 selfie.  (We are taking a picture at 300 yards).  He disagreed and told me to go.  I got 4 yards. We tried one more down but I was too tired to get any yards off.

Phil didn’t want to take a picture but I didn’t have my phone with  and he is my official Barwis Methods photog.  I guilted him into taking it.

Here it is:

#DaisyandPhil Take 2  (I’ve tweeted this pic A BUNCH!!!)

Phil made me get into my own car which I ended up doing.  We did our fist bump thing and he forced my hand into a fist to “joystick” me.  When I got home, I checked to see if he sent me the picture and was happy to see that he had.  I asked him how many times he “joystick”ed me and he responded “6.” It was more like two.

My butt STILL hurts A LOT and Jesse is happy that it does.  I am too though!  I haven’t felt this in SO LONG!!!  It’s amazing to me how INVOLVED walking is but yesterday was the first time I consciously was able to squeeze all of the muscles Phil told me to to get steps off.  I couldn’t squeeze them for consecutive steps yet so I was trading off right and left (Who wants uneven butt muscles?!!!)  Not me.  I got 17 yards yesterday.  Phil told me that that was two weeks with double digits.  (I think it’s 3 but I didn’t argue).

TOTAL YARDAGE = 300 & 2 STEPS

I did NOT sleep at all the night before last.  I stared at the ceiling in the dark WIDE AWAKE!  The last time I saw on the clock was 1:54 am.  I fell asleep only to wake up again at 3:08 am.  I fell back to sleep only to have my alarm wake me up at 4:15 am.  Needless to say, I was BEYOND tired at work and wondered how I was going to perform at Barwis.  The LONG drive to Barwis without the freeway seemed a bit daunting to me.  It was bad enough just having to transfer out of my wheelchair!

As I get to Barwis, I was even more tired!  Phil stretched me out and we go over to the Keiser machine.  He set my feet and told me to stand.  I was SO beyond tired but I found that spot within me to push through it anyway.  Phil told me many times to, “Push!”.  I stood for a total of 6 times and had 4 “fails.”  Then it was time to go.  I think on any other day I would be MOST unhappy with my showing but I was SO tired.  Not workout tired but sleepy tired.  Regardless, I still gave it my all!  I pushed myself.  I was not always successful in my stands but I attempted my stand until Phil told me to sit down.  In one failed attempt, I asked him if he could feel my legs shaking just before he told me to sit down.  He was pushing my right knee trying to help me stand.  I sat down and he said, “yeah.”

I think it was in that failed attempt that he attempted to fist bump me.  Our fist bumps now are us looking at each other with our hands kind of moving like the jellyfish in Sponge Bob (that’s how I see it) and trying to decide what to do.  This attempt ends when Phil just grabs my hand and forces it into a fist and shakes it.  That’s easy for him because his hands are SO much bigger than mine!

I’m not giving up on that though (I’ll get him  when he least expects it!) just like I’m not giving up on walking.  It’s NOT linear!  I knew that.  There will be some bad days but that’s okay.  I’ll push through them.  I have no other choice.  I’m still a bit sleep deprived today and coupled with the fact that it is raining doesn’t really help.  Phil says that it’s a mindset (reacting to the weather) and I have my mind set on walking!  So rain-shmain – I’m pushing through it.