I saw this and shared it on Facebook and it absolutely made me laugh:
That is exactly how I feel! I cannot wait until October 1. But I have NOT left my house since July 21. I am hoping that when I leave my house on September 18 for my haircut, I will smell Fall!!!:
Sean told me today that he heard that the 2023 summer was the highest on record only to be surpassed by the 2024 summer heat! I told him that it’s definitely a lot more unbearable than last year and last year was a little bit tough.
So, I have written before about the fact that my hair is curly now that I’m in my 40s and my Dad was the one in my family who had curly hair. A couple of my brothers have curls and one has waves. I had straight hair. When I was a kid, what I wouldn’t give for curly hair!!!
My Dad did not have very much hair on his the top of head but my Mom disagrees. He had a really big forehead. He didn’t have hair on the top of his head but he grew a ponytail. My Mom did not like it but he did it anyway!
I have crystal clear memories of my Dad getting ready to go somewhere and he would comb his hair before he put it in a ponytail holder. As his ponytail got a little bit longer, the curls would knot up, and I would watch him yank the comb through his hair. I always thought that it looked painful! I remember that it sounded painful!
I am not sure how long after my Dad died, but my Mom brought me the comb that he used to use. I had already cut my hair so I could use combs instead of brushes. She actually brought two combs to my second apartment. I remember that I cried when she brought them to me and I have been using them ever since!
I missed my haircut last month because my power chair needed to be serviced and it’s currently at phase 3 of 6 in the process of when I can take it in to actually get fixed. I am going to have a two month growth before I get my haircut next week. My hairstylist cut my hair short so as it would not curl. She asked if my Mo would blow dry it or if I would have product in my hair and told her that I wouldn’t do that, so she just said that we have to go short, and I agreed.
I remember reading somewhere in a magazine when I was a teenager that hair follicles are different depending on your type of hair. Straight hair follicles are different than curly hair follicles and both of those are different from wavy hair follicles. I’m experiencing a shift in the follicles I think because it feels weird!
So, let’s go to this morning when I was combing my hair with my Dad‘s comb. My hair is getting longer, and it is starting to curl. I do not move when I sleep, so I stay on my back all night and my Tempur-pedic bed. Sometimes, the back of my hair gets knotty now.
This morning, because it is longer and a bit curly, I was running the comb through my hair and it knotted in the back. I stopped pulling the comb through my hair and thought for a moment about my Dad just yanking it through the knots. I paused and gritted my teeth, and just yanked it through my hair! Yes, it hurt A LOT just like I suspected when I was a kid! But I can’t help think are using the same damn comb! This is what it looks like, it was issued by the hospital many years ago and my Dad didn’t want to have to pay for a comb so he didn’t and I guess now I don’t either:
it did bring pause to me to think that we are using the same d*mn comb!
I have been living in my memories for eight years now. Since I stopped working. My Mom and I didn’t find out that I am”Homebound” until December of 2023. I was going to be accepted into the HAP Senior Plus insurance plan because I have been disabled for so long. I no longer make my own memories and just look back into the catalog of my more able bodied times.
I had a doozy of a memory this morning as I was sitting in my bed waiting for my Mom to transfer me out of it!!! it was complete with a soundtrack!!! I heard the opening bars of this song as I saw in my head this scene:
And this is the song that played in my head as I was sitting in my bed waiting to be transferred:
Well, this song was released in 2015. I was still working in 2015! I was the Reading Specialist already for the school. I was still actively working out at Barwis Methods back then! I saw that scene in my head but my memory of that book is different.
I was teaching in my last classroom at that time, a converted closet off of the cafeteria as the Reading Specialist, I always would let my students catch me reading (something I learned specifically in college). I would read between classes. As students would come in, they would see me reading.
I remember that I specifically bought this book because the movie was coming out and this is the actual version of the book that I have:
I was reading the specific part where they go to the horse races, and he is in his power chair, and I knew it was going to be a disaster! As I was reading the words, my eyes started welling with tears but the bell hadn’t rung yet and I had to finish the paragraph.
The memory I had of this song, and this movie was about the book I read and cried in front of my students! They were so concerned, and they asked, “Miss, are you OK?” I remember wiping my eyes and telling them that, “You know that it’s good writing when it emotes emotion!” I was not embarrassed to cry in front of them at all, but one thing that this movie points out is the fact that disability is for the rich!!! I do not have a stable to convert to an handicapped accessible apartment!
Waking up is very difficult for me now, but I’m so happy that I had such a vivid memory to focus on to help me wake up! I am not sure that I will rewatch that movie for a while because it’s kind of tough as a person in a power chair and I am absolutely NOT rich!!!
I received this text at 4:46 PM but I did not see it till probably after 10:30. This was shocking, and I showed my Mom my phone!!!
Such an icon! I forwarded that first text to Sean, but he was already asleep so I unsent it because this is terrible news and I’ll talk to him tomorrow. But I saw this on Twitter and I cried!!! I can’t even watch football anymore at this point, but hearing him talk about U of M made me cry!!!
Well, we have entered into that strange part of the season between seasons so I had the AC on today and a couple days ago. I had the space heater in my bedroom. I was actually sitting with a space heater blowing on my face, because I no longer can control my body temperature! I just can breathe easier now, but I wonder when I will start to freeze, because that will happen much sooner than I wanted to, but it will!
I heard that song tonight as I am thinking about my disease progression and I remember seeing an interview on MTV or VH1, where Edwin McCain talks about how sexy Bonnie Raitt is! I just had to say that here when I play this song because it’s a banger for sure!!!
I pillaged today like I do every Saturday:
But today, I had a change of plan. Last week, as I was distributing pills into my pillbox, my hands felt very uneasy and I couldn’t control my fingers. I thought it was because I was drinking a shake instead of eating dinner. I ate dinner tonight before I pillaged and my hands still got shaky as I was counting out the pill that I take 70 of a week.
Right now, as I am sitting here, thinking about how difficult it was for me to pillage even AFTER I ate dinner, it just points to disease progression. That’s what it is! But now, I am counting out 35 pills a day. I am going back to my naturopath on the 18th. I’m going to have him dose me for some of my supplements. I feel that my needs are changing and it’s a little bit scary!!!
I saw this meme on Facebook Today:
I had already posted this one because Fall was my favorite season even before I was diagnosed with MS!!!
I made the executive decision today, actually yesterday, to stop using my cucumber mint chapstick, because there was just a little bit left and it was kind of hurting my lips so I threw it out and this morning I started pomegranate.
So, it is officially Fall for me now! I’m sure it will get to be winter way too fast because I currently am wearing socks instead of my bare feet. My Mom broke her pinky, the base of it, so I’m not wearing my compression socks right now.
So, this is the my Spring/Summer chapstick:
My next haircut appointment is for September 18 and I have also made an appointment with my naturopath that day. So, I have NOT left my house since July, but I really want to finish this Spring/Chapstick! I’m staring at my Fall chapstick box in my remote control box and I can’t wait! Maybe Friday?
I heard this song yesterday and it made me want to watch Bridget Jones’ Diary. The first one. She doesn’t even look like that anymore but I’m going to watch it sometime after Christmas, I think!: