So, I have been completely immersed in Sara Bareillis this month. I just keep my Apple Music playlist on shuffle. I Had a lyric stuck in my head and I did not know what song it was from so I searched for it deliberately and I found it! This is the lyric that was stuck in my head;
I actually was reading the lyrics to songs and when I heard this song, it sounded familiar so I read the lyrics and sure enough this is what I kept hearing! It’s from this song;
Listening to Sara all month has been kind of bumming me out because I no longer can sing but then this song also pops into my head and it is true!:
Tomorrow’s the day. At 4:17 pm my life change to forever and my world cracked.
I didn’t notice this part of the movie until about the sixth time that I watched it. When I noticed it, I audibly gasped. I can’t NOT notice it now! I will explain after I post the picture. I tried to screenshot the scene from my phone on Netflix but it didn’t allow me to so I had to do it while I watched the movie on my living room TV.
Jon Favereau has a similar build to my Dad in this movie. My Dad didn’t have any tattoos and only wore long sleeve shirts that he would roll the cuffs up to mid-forearm. Sean came home from school one day with his sleeves cuffed like my Dad used to do and I asked him why he did that. Sean told me that it’s more comfortable because his arms are not that long. I started to cry because that is EXACTLY why my Dad cuffed them! I told Sean that the reason he has to do that is because of his, “Ríos genes.” My Dad also only wore polyester blend light blue dress shirts.
Seeing his little hand go around his dad reminded me of doing that when I was that age. My senses were immediately and completely awakened and I instantly knew exactly how soft that shirt felt on his cheek! I thought about it for a little bit longer and I almost could smell my Dad.
This song was the second song I noticed The first time I watch the movie. My Mom would hum it and I would tell her not to but she constantly was doing it. I had to tell her why I asked her not to him it:
Road trip sing-alongs are TREMENDOUSLY fun!!! Especially when I’m with my cousinT, Shannon!!
So, let me set up my reasoning of me NOT really wanting her to hum this song. She thinks that had something to do with my Dad and it does NOT because that would be GROSS!!! TOTALLY GROSS!!!
I would say to picture Sean being this old. I cannot confirm or deny that that song reminds me of a ringtone for someone I used to know and furthermore, I cannot comment on my phone being in his toddler diaper bag (smaller than an infant diaper bag but he wasn’t ready to carry his own bag yet) and being in the checkout line at Target because we were buying him Spiderman fruit snacks. That would really be embarrassing not being able to find the phone until the song had played and its entirety! Not that I know, but I am just speculating.
This song was that person‘s ringtone because I had just seen this movie:
After seeing the guys singing in the food truck, I was reminded of Jack Black singing “Let’s Get it On” and that’s why I asked her not to hum it. this movie has such a GREAT soundtrack!:
So, I really didn’t pay attention to this part of the movie during the song until about May 3 of fourth time watching it. My mind went completely blank and I looked at my Mom and asked for the guy”s name. I knew that it wasn’t Marvin Gaye or Otis Redding but I just didn’t know who it was. I was having a brain fart!
My Mom got up to get the laundry out of the washer from my room. I had renovations done to my house where they knocked a wall down and moved the washer and dryer from where they were to the other side of the house. As she did this, I google searched the song.
I found out that it was Al Green who sang the song. I told that to my Mom but she was in my bedroom pulling clothes out of the washer. I called to her and said that, “Al Green sings it.” I took a little offense to the next thing she asked. She asked me, “Did you say Alvin Green?” (I don’t know if his full name is Alvin but I have only Heard him referred to as, “Al.”
She was on the other side of my house and I waited until she came back to the front room and told her that I was offended said it was Al Green. I told her that I knew his name was Al and then I ended with having her and my Dad as my parents, how can I not know that?!
they both were born and bred in southwest Detroit and they were completely entrenched in Motown growing up!
Saturday is coming closer and I am completely missing my Dad! I don’t know how much of the song the clip from the movie plays so I will add the entire song in this post as well:
I think this year is hitting me a little harder because of Covid. I just miss my Dad! So lately, my Mim and I have been watching, Chef, on Netflix and you know we have watched it multiple times so far! That’s how we work!
There are many things that I like about this movie and I am going to write about 4 things. The first thing I noticed about this movie was this song and I’ve texted it to Sean:
Sean likes this song just like I liked the song he sent to me. It’s kind of like we’re connected or some thing! Like we have been living together for almost 20 years and for all of his life!
My Mom took Leia to the vet this morning while I still slept. I awoke to my mom walking into my bedroom telling me the good news: Leia had a blood test this morning and she is cleared from having heartworm any longer!!! I always thought that a heartworm diagnosis was a, “Game Over” for a dogs but I’m so happy to say that Leia, “Grabbed her guts” and pulled through!!!
This whole ordeal was pretty heart wrenching to witness! I texted Sean the good news:
I’m really excited for my Mom though. She will fall right back into taking Leia for a walk easily! She grabs the leash, puts a mask on (for my protection) and goes for at least two, sometimes three walks a day! They told my Mom to start small and gradually increase the length and duration of the walk so she walked all the way down the block today.
I saw an Olive Garden commercial today and this song they played showing shots of their food was Selena Gomez!!! Is this how it is now?! That song came out when I was in adult! I AM SO OLD!!! I don’t think Selena was talking about food. Just sayin.’ I didn’t think I was THAT old but I’m a little over six months away from 40 so…
Sean texted me this morning at about 9:30 with a song suggestion. I set my phone to do not disturb when I go to sleep so did not wake up until about 1 o’clock but when I did, I listened to it! That sentence made me sound super lazy but that’s not the case because my sleep schedule is so messed up was having had a mess for 20 years!
I had a conversation with Sean some years ago, he was driving and I told him that music these days is not good! I told him that I am old now because I prefer listening to music that I listen to when I was growing up and when I was a young adult. He sent me this song using our Apple Music account. This is the song he sent me:
I listen to the song and told him that I liked it. He said that it sounded like the stuff I used to listen to and he thinks that I might like it. I really did like it but my Mom did NOT! I don’t know if you are familiar with this song but I have a listen:
I think it’s pretty cool that Sean and I can share music! He’s known me all of his life so he knows what I like and I really like that he made this suggestion.but I think I just LOVE him!
Okay, I had my MRI in the beginning of the week. It has taken me until today to process it enough to write about. Bear with me because it’s a little bit difficult and I may ramble a little.
So, my MRI was finished and my Mom had successfully let me know that there is, “No Espace” between us. The tech directed us to the elevators and told us what floor to get off on because we were in the basement. When the doors opened, my Mom stepped out of the elevator and looked down the hall to the left and then to the right. We were in another long hallway and I had no idea where we were.
My Mom took a few steps to the right and then told me that she knew where we were. I followed her for a couple turns and then I saw the chapel and I gasped.
I gasped because it became apparent to me why my Mom knew exactly where she was! My Dad spent so much time there! My brothers and I would refer to my Dad staying in the hospital as, “[Him] going to the spa” because he had so many short stays there.
I continue following my Mom and then we made another turn and were at the hallway between the west entrance and the main entrance. I looked at the floor and specifically the tiles. The tile work is 20 years old. I know it’s 20 years old because I had Sean when it was being completed.
I went to the emergency room downtown because I did not feel okay and when I called Saint Mary’s Hospital where I was supposed to have Sean, they told me since I was only 32 weeks pregnant that they were not equipped to care for me and the baby if necessary.
I was admitted to the hospital downtown early on November 1 and I had Sean on November 2, 2001. I stayed in the hospital with him for a few days and then I was discharged but he was not discharged until December 3rd.
My Mom would drop me off in the morning on her way to work at about 7:15 in the morning and my Dad would pick me up after his work at about 430. I would go home (to my parents’ house), eat dinner, and then go back up to the hospital with Sean‘s dad until about midnight. I spent the entire time rocking and glider in the NICU across from Sean‘s incubator. I was only allowed to hold him for 20 minutes a day. I never held Sean in the morning and kept the time for when his dad came up to the hospital. After a while, the nursing staff saw that I was so dedicated that they told me that I could hold Sean as long as I, “ kangaroo cared.” After they told me that, I would do that until I got hungry.
I utilized the west entrance when being dropped off or picked up because I still was not able to drive that soon after my C-section. I would see that hallway everyday and watched the man slowly and meticulously put the tiles down. He was still doing it when Sean left for the final time in December. I remember that when I would see him carefully putting each tile down I thought of a movie from my childhood:
I remember those little things fixing the tiles to the apartment entrance. They placed each tile one at a time like that man did 20 years ago at Henry Ford Hospital.
So, all of these memories were brought the forefront of my mind. I had my MRI on T -10 and today is T- 6. In six days, it will be 15 years since my Dad‘s death. I was quiet and quite contemplative on the ride home. When I got into my house, I took my sweatshirt off and saw the cotton ball and tape they put on my arm after they injected me with the dye for contrast for my MRI. I Took the tape off, saw my arm, and I started to cry.
Sean and I were recently talking about The fact that he always used to take my Dad‘s bandage off of him when he came home from dialysis. They would work together and my aDad would tell Sean to take off the bandage slowly. I was shocked that Sean remembered that Because he was so young back then!
When I awoke the next day this is what my arm looked like sis, which is a sad commentary on our times:
I thought of how many MRIs they give a day and they can’t even afford higher quality tape?! I have to go back to the hospital in a couple weeks for my Swallow test. I’m a little nervous about that one!
It’s been a minute but I think my YouTube feed refreshed and I was able to see this video:
Maybe that’s what it’s doing, just posting videos that I have never seen before of songs that I love so I get to enjoy them! At least, that’s what I’m telling myself! I love you so much, Bono!!!
