I have been perplexed about the events of early this morning and I STILL am quite perplexed as I’m trying to move through it. I have had Multiple Sclerosis for just over 20 years and I have dealt with many changes in my abilities over the years. Because of this morning, I am still perplexed and dealing with this latest development.
I first want to say that my current bed is the MOST comfortable bed in the world! I bought this bed when I moved to our second apartment that had two bedrooms 15 years ago. I had an awesome Queen sized four poster bed frame that went with it that over the years that I have since had to get rid of. Even though my bed is now on a simple metal frame, it still is extremely comfortable! Sean agrees and he used to sleep in it right after my latest knee surgery and I slept in my medical recliner. My Mom has also taken naps in it and she loves it! She says that it is, “Heaven.”
I also want to say that when I got fitted for my motorized wheelchair, Dave (the tech who explained how the chair worked to me) told me that it is NOT designed to sleep in but many people do that.
So then, there was this morning. It was still dark outside but my body hurt so badly! It was in my bones. My hips and my shoulders ached and I called out to my Mom for help. I moaned as she came into my room and as she pulled me out of my bed and transferred me into my wheelchair. I reclined my chair and was able to fall back to sleep for another four hours in the living room.
In the over 20 years that I have had MS, I have never experienced pain like this! I have dealt with MANY changes in my abilities over the years and I have taken them in stride as best I can. These changes are unfortunate and sadden me whether I am talking about my inability to drive now, the difficulty I have with my speech at times, the changes in my vision, or my inability to sing anymore. All of these things, though sad, I just have to deal with.
But with the pain I experienced this morning and knowing how comfortable my bed actually is, is perplexing. In fact, it’s downright scary. I am scared that it will happen again. I hope not but I guess I will just have to wait and see tonight.