Last night, I found out that Sean‘s friend Who he has known and going to school with since preschool’s grandpa died. Of course that saddened me because I know them and have for a long time as the boys grew.
Then, this morning, I found out that, “My family priest” died in a boating accident. The accident happened last night and his body was found this morning.
These things have made me extremely sad! Today, my face started to hurt from crying so much. I was reminded of how my face felt when my Dad died. It REALLY hurt then and I almost passed out in church twice and the once at the mausoleum. Then, I was devastated and it felt as if my world had cracked. I was completely overwrought!
I have been crying on and off all day today at hearing my Mom talk with my brother about why he is to me, “My family priest.” He came to my Parents’ house and gave my Dad last rites, heard his final confession, and presided over his funeral mass.
Before he did that, I searched him out to have them baptize Sean. I always remember that when I told him what I named him, he asked me how I spelled it. I told him and his response was, “That’s correct” because I spell Sean‘s name the proper Gaelic way.
Just after the funeral mass, we had a picture taken at Sean’s baptism of my family up to that point. (My Parents, my brothers, and the five grandchildren who are alive at the time). Because that picture was our entire family at the time, my Mom asked me if we could put it in my dance coffin that would ultimately be cremated.
I agreed but somehow, today, I wish I had that picture to look at. So, yes, I have been crying on and off all day thinking of these two deaths. I most definitely am saddened but I am not overwrought like when my Dad died. Instead, I am wrought.