Bad

This video showed up in my YouTube feed this morning. I shared it on Facebook before I even got out of bed! It made me think of my first year teaching and when I learned that a colleague shared my love for U2! Well, he’s a guy so he really doesn’t love Bono like I do but he likes the music!

It was either during my first for my second year teaching that we ended up driving to the U2 concert together. We got tickets separately and realized that we were going the same place so my brother and I drove with him and a couple more colleagues. He actually picked out the T-shirts that I still have because I was on Canadian crutches then and it was too far to walk for me.

I have been thinking about my first years teaching, cleaning my classroom, or grading papers/ entering grades into the computer and listening to a best of U2 CD. It was back when I worked way too much in order to get by craft established.

Maybe now my YouTube feed will be flooded with U2 videos. That wouldn’t be a bad thing…

ALMOST Forgotten Tune #51

So, after taking a short nap, I turned on the Hallmark channel. There is a movie premiere after the current one I am watching. The promo for the new movie had this song in it. I was immediately transported back to Spanish class, sophomore year.

My name for Spanish class was, “Julia.” “Julio” sat next to me and he rolled his eyes when I told him that we were Raggedy Anne and Andy! Just before channel one came on, I used to begin singing this song very softly. Lauryn Hill released this song on her “Miseducation” album. I would stand up and stand by his desk next to me gradually beginning to belt this song out. Sometimes I would sit on his lap. I was SO crazy in high school!

#45 OR Disappointing

Last night, I waited until Sean got home from work and then he got me into my bed. I wasn’t tired and Sean sat on the couch resting before he took a shower right after he went to bed.

He was watching the highlight reel of the Detroit Pistons new draft pack from France. Sean was telling me about this right from the living room as I laid in my bed. He told me that he was pretty good and then he told me that he was #45.

He said that was a stupid number and I gasped and told him that #45 what’s my basketball number in high school. He made the statement that I must not have been good, it sounds more like a football number. I laughed and told him that I didn’t say that I was good. I am only 5 feet tall! I told him that I was an off-guard or a small forward because I could box out because I have ALWAYS had a big butt!

He told me that he could not picture me as a basketball player and got into the shower. I searched my camera roll to find this picture:

You told me that it was strange to see me like this and that I pretty much look the same except the creases around my eyes are deeper. Then he told me something that was so disappointing. Disappointing and sad. When I told him that I used to play basketball he told me that he can’t even remember me standing anymore. How sad! I have difficulty remembering that as well.

Protein Shake

I started a no carb diet in 2007ish. Then I switched to the B.E.D diet (same principle) in probably 2010-11? I have been on some form of a low-carb diet for more than a decade. Aside from my birthday, free donut day, and Christmas ( I HAVE to have aunt Lola’s cookies!) I’ve pretty much stayed with it for my health. Knee injury and surgery did a number on me but I have since gotten back on to no carbs this year, since January.

Now that it is warmer outside, I can drink protein shakes in the morning. I need to drink my breakfast because without nourishment, I get faint but I am too tired to chew in the morning. So, after I drink my Kiefer, I have an Atkins protein shake:

This morning, after I shook it up, opened it, and took a drink, I was immediately reminded of being the Reading Specialist at CCA. I got my Masters’ degree in 2010 and taught reading for the past seven years of my employment. I taught two reading programs, READ 180 and Read Naturally. and in order to adhere to the proper way to administer these reading programs, I taught three sections of Read Naturally and four sections of READ 180.

As a result, I forewant my regularly scheduled lunch break and taught straight through the day in order to reach more students. I drank my lunch pretty much every day! So today, as I sipped it, I closed my eyes and remembered so many wonderful times of teaching a reading program that I was very familiar with! It was nice to remember that. It’s interesting how the smallest thing can trigger the greatest memory! And all because of a protein shake.

Different

The book I am currently reading, Good In Bed, is different than I remember it. I must’ve read that book 16 years ago.

Another thing that is different from when I remember first seeing it is Where the Heart Is. That movie is free OnDemand for me right now. Upon watching it, the scene where she is left at Walmart and the camera spins around her made me cry.

It had been so many years since I have seen the movie but that scene gets me every time because that is EXACTLY how it feels to be left taking care of your child. I was extremely lucky to have my Parents’ help in the formative years!

My situation is different than Novalee’s but seeing this movie put me back a little bit. This movie came out almost 20 years ago so things look different now. I swore I would find my, “Forney!”

At this point, I have NOT found him but I also think I am too old to believe that I could find him! But you never know, it could happen. I saw that this movie is based on a book so you KNOW that I ordered it! My life has turned out so vastly different than I thought it would so I can give up finding my, “Forney” because I I’m pretty sure that MS has something way different to say about that…

“Whichever”

It was my first year teaching and I’m not sure if it was my first class ever but when calling the roll, I came across a student named Jorge. I asked him if he wanted to be called George or XOR:xeh (Horhey)? He shyly smiled and said, “Whichever.” I told him that he would have to choose or I would call him, “Whichever.”

I called him, “Whichever” for the rest of the year and while he was still in the middle school when he was in the eighth grade. I have so many memories from the 12 years I taught but this one is from one of my favorite students. I used to sit at the student table in the front of the room in my roller chair before I was wheelchair-bound.

The students were completing independent work when I overheard a conversation that, “Whichever” was having with another student at the table I was sitting at. He was telling them about pedicures. I remember that I stopped what I was doing and looked at him questioningly. He asked me if I had ever gotten a pedicure to which I told him that I had not.

I remember shaking my head and telling both students to get back to work. A few weeks later, “Whichever” came into class beaming. As he sat down, he told me that he just had gotten a pedicure. He took off his left sock and shoe and showed me his toes. As I looked at them, he began to wiggle them!

I remember laughing pretty hard and shaking my head. He came back to the school years later, after he had graduated from high school and after I had become the Reading Specialist. My first office as the Reading Specialist was on the second floor and had a bathroom inside of it.

When I was teaching Read Natually (I taught a small class of six and a couple kids were absent) I ducked into the restroom while my students were working. I heard someone knocking at the door and then I heard voices but I couldn’t tell what they were saying as I washed my hands.

When I came out of the restroom, I saw that there was no one in the classroom other than my students. I asked them who was at the door and they said it was a man. I asked them if he told them who he was and they shrugged and told me that he said something like, “Whatever.” I didn’t know who they were talking about because, “Whichever” had graduated from middle school a good seven years before that.

Later that day, “Whichever” came back to my room to see me! He was all grown up! Every time a male student came back to see me when he was in high school, he would say, “Hi Miss!” to which I would respond copying a very deep voice, “Hi [whatever their name was]” and they would laugh as I told them that they did NOT sound like that when they were in seventh grade!

I’m not sure what made me think of this student this morning but I told Sean about it and he kind of laughed and looked amused that I was THAT kind of teacher. I DO miss that even though it’s summer now!

Oh, Bradley!

So, the breakfast table from GMFB is on vacation this week. I have already seen the segments they were showing. I turned the TV off because nothing good was showing on the Hallmark channel. After reading my book for a while today, I turned the TV back on and decided to check my OnDemand options.

As luck would have it, A Star is Born was free OnDemand for me! I ABSOLUTELY LOVE Bradley Cooper! Sean took me to see this movie in the theater when it first came out! To date, that movie has been the only movie I have never cried my eyes out and was inconsolable as the end credits rolled. Sean stood up and wanted to leave and all I could do was to extend my right index finger and tell him that I needed a minute as my tears continued.

Of course I cried watching the movie today! However, Bradley Cooper is STILL the hottest man alive! After I ate my dollar tacos for Taco Tuesday, I wanted to see Bradley again! I couldn’t handle watching A Star is Born again so I tried my next best option! Burnt!

And OF COURSE Bradley was STILL A CUTIE here as well!!! He’s single now so you never know, this could be my opportunity! I still rock my Eagles Super Bowl Champions shirt because, of course Bradley’s a fan! We have football in common! It would be really cool if he spoke French to me also! I’m just sayin‘…

You Know What I Miss? Volume 5

Continuing with the focus on things that people don’t realize I can no longer do. Even though this one is OBVIOUS that I can’t do it anymore but it’s NOT obvious how much it hurts…

I miss dancing.

I’ve written before that I was never an excellent dancer but I had rhythm. I have missed dancing for a long time. My first summer at Barwis, within the first week maybe, I asked Jesse how long it would be before I could dance again. He told me that that would take a while but he didn’t say I would never do it again. I remember that making me happy.

It’s been six years and five days since my first day at Barwis. I was so hopeful back then! Now, with my knee injury, I’m less hopeful because I’m beginning to forget what it feels like to have two completely normal knees. That part makes me really sad.

Because sleep doesn’t come very easily to me now, I’m laying in bed listening to Sara Bareilles. I am immersing myself in this album a lot these days. When my Mom comes into my house and hears me listening to this album, she tells me that it sounds, “Gray.” She tells me that her music sounds better and this is just soft music and [Sara’s] voice.

I told my Mom that Sara’s voice reminds me of Barwis and my ability to sing. I explained the importance of immersing myself in this album and today as I’m trying to fall asleep, it reminds me of slow dancing. I really miss that right now And I don’t know when I will ever do it again.