I got a call from Binson’s yesterday. In speaking with the woman, I started to cry… I guess I need to go back a couple of years to explain.
Sean was about 2 when I first started to notice I was having balance issues. I was in college and I remember that I would, “wall walk” often. I used to put my fingertips on the wall as I walked to class because felt unsteady.
I remember, one time in my linguistics class, the professor called me up to the board to dissect a sentence. Four or five of us come up to the board and worked on the sentences at the same time. Once we were all finished, we discussed the diagram with the entire class while we stayed standing by the board. I was probably third or fourth to have the discussion.
The professor stood in the back of the room and had us lead the discussion and he chimed in if we struggled. It was probably the second student talking where he interrupted them and asked, ”What are you doing, Jennifer? Dancing?!”
I remember being embarrassed and grabbing the ledge of the board often. I didn’t know that I was swaying to try to find my balance. That professor was a jerk anyway! I think it was a few days later that I watched an episode of ER with my parents. Sean was asleep. One of the doctor’s sister had MS and that was the first time I saw Canadian crutches. I called my neurologist not long after that evening to get a pair for myself.
I got them shortly after. After that, I could never carry Sean when he was not in the stroller, rather I would pat my thigh and tell him to, “Hold mama’s crutch” when we went places by ourselves. Shortly after I got comfortable with walking with the crutches, I broke my right ankle when I was student teaching. I slipped on ice at my parents’ house before school one day. The doctor told me that I broke my ankle, “into pieces” and I had to wait for the orthopedist to set it. They weren’t in yet for the day but when they came in, they did not cast me, rather gave me a boot.
Respectively, I probably should have been cast because it took six months for my ankle to heal. The orthopedist prescribed a wheelchair as my ankle healed so I could stay off of my foot. I was out of the wheelchair for a little while after I was out of the cast but then my Dad died. It was easier to be in a wheelchair during that very difficult time.
I used that generic wheelchair for years. When the seat would bow too much (because, let’s face it, I have a big butt! I know it!), I would just order a new one online. My neurologist’s nurse suggested that I get a custom wheelchair. I did not want to get one at all! I finally caved a couple of years ago. Diane fitted me for a custom manual chair at RIM (Rehabilitation Institute of Michigan). Binson’s built it.
Christie came to my house a while back to tighten the brakes and she watched me as I rolled around my house to the kitchen and back to the living room. As I’ve said before, I no longer have strength in my legs so my feet drag. Whenever I change directions, my knee gets a little tweaked. Christie told me that I should get an electric chair.
She told me that it would be better for my knee and it took me a little while to get kind of OK with that. I set up a neurologist appointment not too long ago and my neurologist prescribed one. Diane fitted me for it a couple if months ago and yesterday, the call from Binson’s was to let me know that it was ready. There was a cancellation so I am going tomorrow to get my chair.
I don’t have a vehicle to transport an electric chair in my car but Christie explained that I need it to use in my house.
I have spent today trying to process all of this and crying! I’m hoping to get enough tears out today that I won’t, “poop out” tomorrow because I will cry tomorrow! Hopefully, it won’t be as much if I can get the tears out today.