Month: August 2017

On my way to ATI, Linda called me and said they still are taking their appointments even though they lost power. We were on our way there and I figured that it is always really cold in there so couldn’t be that warm.  Driving there, I heard song after song that reminded me of jamming to them when I drove myself to Barwis, back when I worked with Adam.

It was drizzling and overcast and it almost gave a melancholy feel to my nostalgia.  When we pulled into the parking lot on Plymouth Oaks Blvd., the songs continued (I don’t even remember what was playing) but seeing the “Barwis Methods” screen prints on the windows completely made me nostalgic and almost sad.

When we got into ATI, it was so dark. I never realized how many lights there are at ATI until they were all off.  The first table (where I usually am) had enough light from the window but it was kind of overcast and drizzling so it didn’t light up the last table against the far wall so they moved it into the open space up front used to do different exercises.

Brad came over with the gait belt and pressed the lever with his foot to  move the table downward.   We looked at each other and both started to laugh.   It’s amazing how much you use power without thinking about it; but when you are powerless, you realize that you took it for granted when you used it.

I didn’t do stands because the table was really high up so my feet did not touch the ground for me to be able to stand. Instead, Brad worked my knee and I did my foot raises, butt squeezes,  and pushed my leg out and pulled it in. I was extremely tired! It had gotten warmer but it wasn’t too uncomfortable. I looked at him questioningly and  asked about not doing ice and stim. because they were powerless. He said he could put an ice pack on my knee and that it might be cold so that is what he did.  It was cold so it felt good!

During my time there, I learned that there was a  transformer explosion and there was no power when we came there in downtown Plymouth. Power was supposed to be restored later that night.   I felt bad for everybody as we left because it looks like it may start to get  warmer and uncomfortable.   I wondered if they will have to stay the whole day being powerless and all.

Larry wasn’t there when it was my time  at ATI so Alanna spotted me from behind for my stands. We did the stands first thing. My first two downs  were really strong and my third and fourth down weren’t that good. I tired out  easily.   I could feel my legs start to tighten up and I laid back on the table.

Brad bend my right knee.   He bent it  like this before and measured it at 113°. Today wasn’t as good but it felt good and  I really felt the stretch. He stretched my left leg out the same way  as well. Then he put my thigh on his shoulder and stretched my thigh toward my chest.

This stretch was stretching my hip out. He measured it before at 102° and this wasn’t that good but again, it felt really good!  He also stretched my left leg out. I lifted my right foot up and then did a lot better job with my left foot. I moved my right leg out and pushed it in and did the same with my left leg, only better.

Alana came over and set me up with ice and stim. I laid back, closed my eyes, and enjoyed the ice.  It’s frustrating that I tire out so easily and my right leg has become so weak. I can’t wait to get back to Barwis so I can start to work on that again.   I say that as if it is going to be easy once I go back there because I know it is not going to be; but, I miss it so much! Next week is Alanna’s last week at ATI.   She is in  physical therapy school at Wayne State.

I started off with my stands with Brad and Larry. My first down was my strongest. As I sat resting a bit, Larry reminded me of making a sound whenever I stood at Barwis. I had completely forgotten about this!  He asked what sound I made  and as I stood and pulled my shoulders back and my knees felt sturdy; said it, *BINK*.

He started to laugh and as I sat down, he told Brad all about it. He said it sounded so silly amidst all of the blaring music and people working out to hear the sound I made.   We all laughed and I thought of Adam.   I told Brad that I only said it when I felt sturdy in my stand and then I would tell Adam that I could, “Stand  for days!”

My first two stands that day were pretty good and my last two stands weren’t so good. I was so excited that at least I was standing! Or, attempting to stand when it came to my third and fourth down.   I laid back down on the table and Brad started me working my knee. I did left foot raises   And then Brad walked around to the other side of the table and put the foam roller underneath my right knee and had me raise my foot on the right side. It was so much easier! I could do it so much better! That made me feel better because  it let me know that my difficultly  raising my left leg wasn’t so much that I have MS but it was because I had surgery.

I was tired after all of this and Brad told me that I was going to get some well-deserved ice and stim.  I smiled and agreed with him. I laid back as the stim. machine was going and thought about Barwis. I was so afraid I was losing so much strength because I haven’t been there in so long but today, I realized all is not lost. All that work I did was NOT for nothing. I still have some strength! Granted, I have lost a lot but I hope to get it back quickly once I am back to Barwis.

I thought about the fun I would have  standing with Adam and the fact that Larry remembered it with fondness also, made me all the more happy!   All the work I did at Barwis seems like a distant memory    I hope to go back there soon; but in the meantime, I will just *BINK* at ATI!

Once I got on the table, Brad worked my knee a bit and told me that when I was finished with the exercises; I would stand. When I heard this, I didn’t believe that I could do it. He worked my knee out a bit and  had me raise my foot and push my leg out and pull it back in. He called Larry over and then it was time to stand.

I was reminded of my failed attempts at standing with Michael end it made me really nervous!  I wasn’t sure how this would go. My knee is feeling better but it’s still aches, so much so that I have to take some Tylenol and  slightly grit my teeth through the pain.  Brad put a gait belt and me and Larry stood behind the table.   I’m not sure if he knelt on the table but I think so because he was close. Brad pulled me up to standing and surprisingly I was able to!

I didn’t feel that it was like a Barwis stand but Brad says I did pretty good! After I sat back down on the table, he told me to make sure to lean forward with my shoulders can’t keep my shoulders back when I am standing. My second and third downs were shorter because I could feel myself getting tired but I was still able to stand.   As I sat on the table after my third down, Brad reminded me to put my shoulders back as I stand and to lead with them when I am coming off of the table. My fourth down was really good!

Brad and Larry laid me back down on the table and I got set up with ice and stim. I really looked forward to it! I was throughly tired!  I was more physically exhausted this time, rather than mentally.  I laid back and let the cool ice pack  and the pulsating electricity calm my knee.

I got four downs when it came to standing. I told Brad about my attempts at walking at Barwis. Regardless of yards, I got four downs.  I wasn’t completely impressed with my stands but I was excited that all was not lost with me not being at Barwis for so long!  I didn’t have an impressive drive  with my four downs but it’s a beginning!

Oh Brad and Larry got me on the third table and as I laid back, Brad bend my knee and started shaking it.  These shakes were deliberate  so I asked him what he was doing. He explained to me in  such specific scientific terms that I tried my best to understand. He explained it with such ease and I was finding it difficult to comprehend.

I was reminded of when Adam told me about proprioceptors.  When I looked that term up, I read a short excerpt about them and took a test about what I had just read. I failed it. So I guess I’m not cut out to be an athletic trainer or physical therapist.  Heck, I AM cut out to be a teacher (have the degrees and certificates to prove it!). but I’m not even that anymore!   Forgive my momentary self-pity, my apologies!

Anyway… I marveled at Brad’s knowledge and told him about it. He just laughed and continued shaking my knee a bit and then I did my PNFs of sorts.   He had me kick my right leg up. I did three sets of these and then he had me push my leg out and pull it in. I was actually pleased with myself even though it’s not very  impressive.

I got set up with ice and stim. and as I laid back and stared at the ceiling.  I had a strange feeling come over my entire body. It was a familiar feeling but one that I haven’t felt for a long time. I stared at the ceiling and it took a minute for me to realize what it was. I was  extremely mentally tired!

This is the feeling I used to have at Barwis all the time! I haven’t had that feeling in a long time because I haven’t been to Barwis in a long time!  But this was my first time feeling it at physical therapy. I was exhausted but excited by my exhaustion, if that makes any sense.

Coupled with this mental exhaustion is physical exhaustion even though I didn’t do much physical activity; anytime I am trying to reconnect my brain with  movement in my legs, it’s completely exhausting!  I laid there and my brain felt kind of fuzzy but I smiled within myself knowing why I was so tired! It made me excited that I am trying to get my brain to make my legs move.  I had some  success and because of that, I felt accomplished and happy.

As soon as I got into my car, I completely zonked! I  didn’t wake up  until we were almost back in Dearborn and my brother was in the car and I had no idea he was.   He needed a ride to the car dealership to pick up his rental because he was getting work done on his car so we were dropping him off before I got home because I live near the car dealership.

I felt groggy the rest of the night but it made me happy because  it meant I was doing hard-core work even though it doesn’t look like it to other people.  I felt I was working on more than just healing from surgery but also working my way back to Barwis.