Month: March 2015

The sun was shining when I pulled up to Barwis so Dan was training someone outside and Megan was using the table just inside the door.  I showed her my socks and wheeled inside.

(Mike took this picture for me at the end of my session.)

There were 3 other wheelchairs inside.  NICE.  I waited by the chairs but all of the doors were open so it got a little chilly after a while so I moved to just across from the blue table.  Someone in a wheelchair left and another wheelchair came in.  When it was my time and Mike took me to the blue table and kneaded my calves.  I told him to look at my socks (they had flying pigs on them) and he told me to show Megan.  I told him that I already did and started laughing.  He asked where I got them and I told him TotallyRadSocks.com.  He told me it was more like TotallyStupidSocks.com and I corrected him.  He asked if me and Megan shopped there together and I told him that we shop separately.  I looked around at the wheelchairs and told him that I used to be the only “First Stepper” who came in the evening.  I told him that right now, I felt like in order to be cool, you had to be in a wheelchair.  Last winter, a man with a camera came up to me as I got into Barwis and greeted my and told me, “Hi, you must be Jen.”  I wasn’t sure how he knew my name but then he explained that he was going to take pictures for the First Step Foundation and most of the First Steppers came to workout earlier in the day but he waited for me.  Then it made sense.  I was the only one in a wheelchair so of course I was Jen.  I am a First Stepper.  But now, I felt like  it’s a wheelchair club right now.  I took a picture of the new decal that was on the wall because of it.

Mike stretched me really good but it wasn’t as painful as it has been.  I snapped this picture as he was doing this. Just to be sure I had a pic of my totally rad socks.

When he had me lay on my stomach, I asked him how I felt.  He told me that my range of motion was great and soon we would do some TNF stretching.  I asked what that was and he told me to look it up.  I texted Nick yesterday to find out what it was.  He told me that he had no clue and asked if I meant PNF.  I told him that I didn’t know and told him that Mike told me about this after he told me that my range of motion was great (I REALLY liked hearing that by the way!).  Then he texted back with the explanation.  Apparently:

PNF stands for Proprioreceptive Neuromuscular Facilitation which is a way [Mike] can modulate the central nervous system to improve not only activation but inhibition of movements.

I thought of Phil and I was just happy that I knew what “proprioreceptive” meant.  I can’t wait to tell Mike that I know what it means but I’m NOT sure I’ll tell him that Nick told me.  I let that text sink in and I read it a few more times.  I think this means good things for my walking and that excites me!!!  My legs were relaxed when I drove home and my butt feels like it did some work but doesn’t hurt so badly like it did before.  Just as the weather is breaking, I feel that progress is evident and that feels good!!!

 

I smelled Spring when I got out of school and I was really excited!  It will be nice for this Winter to FINALLY be over!!!  That being said, this Winter was NOT 1/2 as bad as last Winter!  I’m a bit amazed that I don’t feel as badly as it did last year.  Almost 20 months of working will do that to you  I suppose.  When I got to Barwis, I saw that they opened. One door a little less than half-way.  Just big enough for me to squeeze under!  I’m only 4’1 when I’m seated so you KNOW I had to roll under while tilting my head back as if I were participating in a limbo contest.  Mike was just on the other side of the door and was surprised to see me.  I told him that The Eagles weren’t very good limbo music (that was what was playing through the speakers) but I didn’t mind so much.   As I waited for my time by the chairs, I took this picture that shows Megan talking to a woman.  I don’t know who she was but she wasn’t there to workout.

Mike pushed me to the blue table, put me on it, and started kneading my calves and knuckling my thighs.  Then he had me lay back and he stretched my legs.  Then he had me lay on my stomach and stretched my legs back and told me that I felt good when I asked.  The stretch has REALLY been feeling good and it is nice to see progress toward walking amid this cold and snow.  But, maybe Spring is on the horizon just like walking is for me.  He had me lay on my back and started doing some abducctor work.  He said something just like my Dad used to and unexpectedly, it squeezed my heart a bit.  I knew I couldn’t talk about it lest I cry but I said the bare minimum.  He put me back in my chair, I got my jacket, and he let me limbo out of the door to my car.

He put me in my car and I began to drive home.  The radio was on but I can’t say which songs were playing.  I was deep in thought about my Dad, the events right before and after his death, and how little my son was and I began to cry.  I cried the entire ride home.  I remembered that Jesse told me in the beginning of my work to walk that lots of emotional things will be stirred up.  Perhaps it is to derail me from my goal?  This is NOT to say that I am NOT a sissy, cry-face baby because I AM.  I KNOW I am. But it surprised me how these particular memories came up right now.  I keep thinking 8 and a 1/2 years removed that things will be easier.  They’re not.  A friend told me that in the beginning.  He was right.  I think of that The Script song and I wonder, “If he (my Dad) could see me now” and all my work at Barwis. ???

 

 

 

Deeds pulled me in to Barwis but once inside I asked Madison to help me find my phone.  I lost it somewhere in my car so she took me back outside and called it.  She crawled into my car into the driver’s seat and listened.  It ended up being behind the passenger’s seat on the floor.  I could NEVER have gotten it!  I was SO grateful that she got it for me and I got that familiar pang of irritation/sadness with the knowledge and realization that I physically couldn’t do that myself.  At least not NOW anyway.  But, one day soon I hope.  I LOVE that everybody at Barwis are like family now and anyone of them would help me out (EXCEPT Mike Rhoades – just kidding).  She pushed me back inside and I waited for my time.

Mike pushed me over to the blue table and sat me on it.  I told him that I slept HORRIBLY the night before and that my legs felt pretty tight.  He kneaded my calves and knuckled my thighs.  He told me to lay back and as soon as my shoulders hit the mat, my back painfully arched and I sat up.  I saw Mike get that look in his eye, the one that Jesse and Phil used to get as well.  It was as if Mike was mentally flipping through his kinesiology rolodex deciding on how he was going to stretch me.  He told me to lay back again but this time raised my legs over his right shoulder.  He pushed my knees against him to straighten my legs.

My back felt better but then he had me bend my knees with my feet on the table.  He bent my right leg over my left knee like I was sitting like a man and told me that it was a “modified pretzel” that he was putting me in.  I didn’t think it was any different but he stood on my right side and leaned in.  Searing pain ripped through my right hamstring straight through my right buttcheek.  I screamed, “You’re going to rip off my leg” five or six times.  He didn’t ease up and I endured as best as I could.

My legs were Jell-O and Mike put me in my car.  I fell asleep easily and slept well.  I woke up in the morning and realized a couple of things:  my legs felt tangled and I couldn’t untangle them and my Mom hadn’t gone to work yet.  I called her and asked her to stop by to help me get out of bed.  I couldn’t move.  My house was on her way to work (she is a preschool teacher) and has a Saturday “Baby and Me” child and parent class.  She came into my house (she has a key) and found me laying in bed with my son asleep in his room.  My back was to her when she came into my room.  Before she touched me, asked her to uncover me and untangle my legs and to do it fast because it was going to hurt.  She replied that I should have just said, “Ooh Doggie!”.  I laughed and once I was in my chair explained to her that it has to hurt if it’s to heal and assured her that I would be better as the day went on and I was.

I was late to Barwis so I called and Connor came out to get me when I got there on Friday.  He originally was going to push me to the blue table but I had to take my jacket and hat off so he pushed me to the chairs.  Mike came over to get me as I was taking my jacket off.  He started pushing me over to the blue table but I was side tracked by Megan.  She asked me what I wanted to listen to.  I told her 90’s Pop but I don’t think that is what she put on.  Mike and Megan were talking and the conversation ended with Mike challenging Megan to a llip-sync Battle which she accepted jubilantly.

We ended up at the blue table and I talked about the ONLY lip–sync contest I saw on Jimmy Fallon.  It was the night of the Super Bowl and I was bummed that the Seahawks lost but Kevin Hart and Will Ferrell were funny.  Mike told me that the funniest lip-sync contest was Paul Rudd.  He pulled it up for me on his phone.  I watched it and laughed A WHOLE LOT as he stretched me.  Then he told me of another funny battle and pulled that one up too.  It was Joseph Gordon Levitt and Stephen Merchant.  This one too, was also VERY FUNNY!  I had never seen them before, I told him that I am never up late enough to watch them.

Then he had me lay on my stomach and I told him that this wasn’t such a stretch as he bent my foot back toward my butt.  But, just as I said this, he leaned in and I grunted, “Now, this is a stretch!”  i asked him how it felt and he told me that my range of motion has really improved which is exactly how I felt too.  It was good to hear it.  He put me in my car and I was relaxed driving home.  It wasn’t until Saturday morning when I realized how BIG of a stretch I received on Friday because my butt hurt A LOT!  But those videos were absolutely hilarious!!!

 

Deeds pulled me into Barwis.  I was exhausted as I waited for my time.  MS Awareness Week has taken its toll on me both physically and emotionally.  I was relieved that I was at Barwis.  I feel safe when I’m there.  It’s my second home.  I’ve been coming here for nearly 20 months now.  Almost 2 years.  It gives me hope coming here and working SO hard to walk.  ALL of the trainers here reinforce my hope.  They believe in me too.  So, Mike walks over and tells me that he has my shirt here and that he will wear it when it is my time.  I got SUPER excited because I gave him an MS Awareness Week shirt from my school.  I was wearing the semi-matching sweatshirt so we were going to be sort of “matchers.” I told him that we would have to take a selfie which he refused.  Hmmm. I’ll have to work on that.  In the meantime, I showed Megan my socks.  It WAS “Wacky Sock Wednesday” #6.

When it was my time, Mike came over, pushed me to the blue table, and put me on it.  Then he went to change his shirt from his Barwis Methods shirt to his CCA-MS MS Awareness Week 2015 shirt.  I had my phone with me because I had to take a picture of my socks (they were MS Awareness Week influenced).  Mike isn’t too keen on taking pictures (like Phil) so I snapped this one as he came out and walked to the blue table where I was sitting:

I was SUPER excited to see him and let my excitement that we were almost “matchers” be known pretty loudly.  Nick heard me and took this picture and sent it to me (probably, mostly to annoy Mike but I didn’t mind.   My room is pretty cold so I learned last year that I needed a sweatshirt in addition to a t-shirt.

My right hand was weak and numb because I was pretty stressed this week so Mike kneaded my forearm and showed me how to stretch it out to make it feel better.  It felt better so he had me lay back.  He stretched my legs up so I was able to get a picture of my socks for “Wacky Sock Wednesday” #6.  They are orange tie-dye because this week is MS Awareness Week and the national color for MS is orange.

He stretched my legs for a long time like this.  I snapped the picture before he had straightened both of my knees.  After we did this stretch, he sat as we rested a bit. But then, I was able to snap this one:

This picture seems like an advertisement for my school.  I tweeted it asking if we had a new Aztec Eagle.  It was just after this picture that Mike took my phone.  He put it on my wheelchair so there was NO WAY I was getting it back.

He put me in the, “Ooh Doggie!” stretch and had me lay on my stomach and stretched my legs so my heels  were  close to touching my butt. The stretch is not as intense and I have a much better range of motion.  Then my time was up so he put my shoes back on, pushed me over to get my coat, and put me in my car.  I  had gotten my phone back and snapped a picture of him stowing my chair in case the other ones weren’t good.

So, we didn’t take a selfie but when it is a “Wacky Sock Wednesday” as well as a “Walking Wednesday” one is coming.  So, be warned Mike!  My butt hurt on Thursday.

 

 

 

 

Deeds pulled me in to Barwis again.  He runs the high school group and they are usually doing drills using the 20 yard hash marks or  running their sprints usually so he is by the door.  I guess that is kind of our thing.  He will stop and pull me in and I tell him it gives the kids a rest, a chance to catch their breaths.  Maybe secretly they are thanking me.  So I got in and waited for my time.  Mike pushed me to the chairs and I didn’t wear my hat and gloves because it almost seemed like it was going to get warmer.  It since hasn’t but it can’t be cold FOREVER!).

Mike pushed me over to the table and sat me on it.  Monday was an emotionally draining day for me.  It was the beginning of MS Awareness Week and I am doing some fundraising for the Michigan chapter of the MS Society at my school (CCA-MS) and we had a speaker come in to talk to the kids during their e3 classes and before lunch.  It has taken over 10 years for me to finally talk about MS but I wanted my kids to know about it because I knew nothing about MS before they told me that I had it.  I was tired but looked forward to my stretch.  Mike kneaded my calves and knuckled my thighs because my legs were pretty tight because I was emotionally spent.

He had me lay back slowly but I was able to do so without it hurting too, too badly.  He stretched my legs up and put me in the, “Ooh Doggie!” stretch with my feet pointed toward my right side.  Then he crossed my legs, took a step back, and pulled his phone out.  He was doing something on his phone and told me to uncross my legs.  I closed my eyes (because that is what I do when I REALLY have to concentrate) and tried to think of which muscles to activate in my legs to get them uncrossed.  My mind was moving very quickly but my legs weren’t.  Mike told me something like whenever I want to uncross them because they hadn’t moved.

But then it was like that moment when you feel a knot you are trying to untie loosen a bit so you KNOW you will untie it.  It was like it was a Rocky movie (4 is my FAVORITE) and the music has started playing during the fight.  The Russian has already been cut and the tide has changed.  I felt my legs move and I KNEW I was going to uncross my legs.  I did and threw my arms up as I laid on the table and yelled, “Ta-Da!” pretty loudly!  Deeds said, “Geez Jen!” from across the room and Mike just kind of shook his head with a straight face.

He stretched the other side and I uncrossed my legs for a second time.  You know I had to yell another, “Ta-Da!”  I uncrossed my legs TWICE!  It is SO cool to tell my legs to do something and for them to actually do it!!!