Category: Barwis Methods

Once I got on the table, Brad worked my knee a bit and told me that when I was finished with the exercises; I would stand. When I heard this, I didn’t believe that I could do it. He worked my knee out a bit and  had me raise my foot and push my leg out and pull it back in. He called Larry over and then it was time to stand.

I was reminded of my failed attempts at standing with Michael end it made me really nervous!  I wasn’t sure how this would go. My knee is feeling better but it’s still aches, so much so that I have to take some Tylenol and  slightly grit my teeth through the pain.  Brad put a gait belt and me and Larry stood behind the table.   I’m not sure if he knelt on the table but I think so because he was close. Brad pulled me up to standing and surprisingly I was able to!

I didn’t feel that it was like a Barwis stand but Brad says I did pretty good! After I sat back down on the table, he told me to make sure to lean forward with my shoulders can’t keep my shoulders back when I am standing. My second and third downs were shorter because I could feel myself getting tired but I was still able to stand.   As I sat on the table after my third down, Brad reminded me to put my shoulders back as I stand and to lead with them when I am coming off of the table. My fourth down was really good!

Brad and Larry laid me back down on the table and I got set up with ice and stim. I really looked forward to it! I was throughly tired!  I was more physically exhausted this time, rather than mentally.  I laid back and let the cool ice pack  and the pulsating electricity calm my knee.

I got four downs when it came to standing. I told Brad about my attempts at walking at Barwis. Regardless of yards, I got four downs.  I wasn’t completely impressed with my stands but I was excited that all was not lost with me not being at Barwis for so long!  I didn’t have an impressive drive  with my four downs but it’s a beginning!

I started off with my stands with Brad and Larry. My first down was my strongest. As I sat resting a bit, Larry reminded me of making a sound whenever I stood at Barwis. I had completely forgotten about this!  He asked what sound I made  and as I stood and pulled my shoulders back and my knees felt sturdy; said it, *BINK*.

He started to laugh and as I sat down, he told Brad all about it. He said it sounded so silly amidst all of the blaring music and people working out to hear the sound I made.   We all laughed and I thought of Adam.   I told Brad that I only said it when I felt sturdy in my stand and then I would tell Adam that I could, “Stand  for days!”

My first two stands that day were pretty good and my last two stands weren’t so good. I was so excited that at least I was standing! Or, attempting to stand when it came to my third and fourth down.   I laid back down on the table and Brad started me working my knee. I did left foot raises   And then Brad walked around to the other side of the table and put the foam roller underneath my right knee and had me raise my foot on the right side. It was so much easier! I could do it so much better! That made me feel better because  it let me know that my difficultly  raising my left leg wasn’t so much that I have MS but it was because I had surgery.

I was tired after all of this and Brad told me that I was going to get some well-deserved ice and stim.  I smiled and agreed with him. I laid back as the stim. machine was going and thought about Barwis. I was so afraid I was losing so much strength because I haven’t been there in so long but today, I realized all is not lost. All that work I did was NOT for nothing. I still have some strength! Granted, I have lost a lot but I hope to get it back quickly once I am back to Barwis.

I thought about the fun I would have  standing with Adam and the fact that Larry remembered it with fondness also, made me all the more happy!   All the work I did at Barwis seems like a distant memory    I hope to go back there soon; but in the meantime, I will just *BINK* at ATI!

Larry wasn’t there when it was my time  at ATI so Alanna spotted me from behind for my stands. We did the stands first thing. My first two downs  were really strong and my third and fourth down weren’t that good. I tired out  easily.   I could feel my legs start to tighten up and I laid back on the table.

Brad bend my right knee.   He bent it  like this before and measured it at 113°. Today wasn’t as good but it felt good and  I really felt the stretch. He stretched my left leg out the same way  as well. Then he put my thigh on his shoulder and stretched my thigh toward my chest.

This stretch was stretching my hip out. He measured it before at 102° and this wasn’t that good but again, it felt really good!  He also stretched my left leg out. I lifted my right foot up and then did a lot better job with my left foot. I moved my right leg out and pushed it in and did the same with my left leg, only better.

Alana came over and set me up with ice and stim. I laid back, closed my eyes, and enjoyed the ice.  It’s frustrating that I tire out so easily and my right leg has become so weak. I can’t wait to get back to Barwis so I can start to work on that again.   I say that as if it is going to be easy once I go back there because I know it is not going to be; but, I miss it so much! Next week is Alanna’s last week at ATI.   She is in  physical therapy school at Wayne State.

 

On my way to ATI, Linda called me and said they still are taking their appointments even though they lost power. We were on our way there and I figured that it is always really cold in there so couldn’t be that warm.  Driving there, I heard song after song that reminded me of jamming to them when I drove myself to Barwis, back when I worked with Adam.

It was drizzling and overcast and it almost gave a melancholy feel to my nostalgia.  When we pulled into the parking lot on Plymouth Oaks Blvd., the songs continued (I don’t even remember what was playing) but seeing the “Barwis Methods” screen prints on the windows completely made me nostalgic and almost sad.

When we got into ATI, it was so dark. I never realized how many lights there are at ATI until they were all off.  The first table (where I usually am) had enough light from the window but it was kind of overcast and drizzling so it didn’t light up the last table against the far wall so they moved it into the open space up front used to do different exercises.

Brad came over with the gait belt and pressed the lever with his foot to  move the table downward.   We looked at each other and both started to laugh.   It’s amazing how much you use power without thinking about it; but when you are powerless, you realize that you took it for granted when you used it.

I didn’t do stands because the table was really high up so my feet did not touch the ground for me to be able to stand. Instead, Brad worked my knee and I did my foot raises, butt squeezes,  and pushed my leg out and pulled it in. I was extremely tired! It had gotten warmer but it wasn’t too uncomfortable. I looked at him questioningly and  asked about not doing ice and stim. because they were powerless. He said he could put an ice pack on my knee and that it might be cold so that is what he did.  It was cold so it felt good!

During my time there, I learned that there was a  transformer explosion and there was no power when we came there in downtown Plymouth. Power was supposed to be restored later that night.   I felt bad for everybody as we left because it looks like it may start to get  warmer and uncomfortable.   I wondered if they will have to stay the whole day being powerless and all.

 

I got to ATI a little bit early and Mira told me that I had paperwork to fill out. Brad has told me that every 10 visits, a client is required to fill out progress monitoring forms.   Brad and Larry both told me they do not like the forms; no one does.    I don’t like them so much either.   I have filled them out three times since my surgery.

For me, I dislike these forms so much because they highlight my physical limitations. They ask questions that I wouldn’t be able to do even if I didn’t have knee surgery.   Things like walking upstairs and  carrying heavy things.  I can’t do either of those anymore  even before surgery.   I can’t even fill these questionnaires out on my own. My mom has to ask me the questions and she fills them in because my hand-eye coordination is not good enough to fill in the bubbles.

Brad told me during my appointment time that clients who have had strokes or some kind of neurological problem do not have to fill the form out. Because I am being seen for my knee,  I have to fill them out.   Neurologically, I am not able  to complete any of the actions that answering these questions have to do with. Because I had knee surgery, I have to.   I told Brad that the forms are completely depressing!

I did my leg lifts and pushed my leg in and out. I did my stands but they were not that impressive.   It was the forms that completely depressed me! I went through the motions but I think because Brad is such a good therapist that eventually I will get  stronger and back to Barwis.

 

Brad was on vacation so I worked with Luba. We did all of my normal PNFs and we weren’t sure if we are going to do the stands but Larry agreed to do it. Brad stands in front of me and Larry is behind me so Luba wasn’t sure if she was strong enough  to pull it off.   Larry assured her that we could do it so Luba put the belt on. Rather than being around my rib cage, she put it around my waist.

Luba pulled one of the roll-y chairs up to me and had a seat. I explained my “four downs” to her and she set my feet and I begin them.   I was surprised at how strong they were and it made me happy. We made jokes about the “Lord of the light” helping me to stand because I had just started  watching Game of Thrones and I was only on the second season, five episodes in.

All four of my downs were strong and Larry said that they were the best he has seen so far! This really made me feel good! It made it seem so promising that I was close to being  back to Barwis soon.  once my stands were finished, I laid back down on the table and got hooked up with ice and stim.   I laid back and close my eyes feeling pretty good because my stands were strong!  As I laid back,  Luba let me know that my stands were so strong because we had “Girl Power!”  And this made me smile even more!

Larry was done working for the day so it was just me and Luba. We were not going to do the stands today. That really made me feel good because the day before, my knee popped out of its socket.  It popped out like it did so many times just before my surgery. This hurt and really scared me! It scared me because it made me feel  like I needed another surgery because it hurt so badly! I totally can attest to the fact that recovery from knee surgery is very difficult!   I never want to do it again!

I told Luba about my knee popping out and how much it scared me.  It made me feel better that I wasn’t going to stand so instead, Luba  rubbed my knee and I did my right leg lifts. I could only left a little bit and then my leg pooped out and Luba had to lift it the rest of the way.  I asked Luba why it was doing this, and she told me it was, ” weakness.”

I thought about that as I was hooked up for ice and stim.  I didn’t like hearing it, but I knew it was true. It frustrates me that  my leg was still weak but I am working so hard to get it straight the back! It stinks that this “weakness” persists!

My knee continued to pop out all weekend. It popped out about five or six times. Each time, it hurt and made me  extremely nervous.   I called Dr. Frush’s office Monday morning and talked with Kristen (his assistant) about it. My return appointment to see Dr. Frush was on September 18th so she moved it up to August 31st. She said once Dr. Frush puts his “magic hands” on me, he will know what is going on.   I explained to her that I was really freaked out and thought that I needed another surgery.

She told me that it was up to me whether I would go to physical therapy or not because I knew my body best. I decided NOT to go to physical therapy because my knee hurt so badly!   I called Brad at ATI to cancel my Monday and Wednesday appointments. I told him that I would go see Dr. Frush Thursday morning and maybe I would be to ATI in the afternoon.

Once I was waiting in Dr. Frush’s office, his intern, Dr. Iman came in.  I explained to him that I was freaked out about needing another surgery and told him where it hurt.   The pain was on the inside of my knee. I felt it had something to do with my MCL which was part of my original  injury almost one year ago.

Every spot he pressed on my knee hurt. He said he did not think I needed surgery but would wait until Dr. Frush came in to examine me.  Dr. Frush came in and examined my knee by pressing all the places that Dr. Iman had.  They started throwing around words like bursa, tendonitis, hamstring tendonitis, and Dr. Frush told me that I needed an ultrasound to be done.   He thought this involved my MCL. He told me a specific doctor to get to give me my ultrasound because he would do a good job.

The earliest I could see this doctor on September 6th.   Dr. Frush did not believe that I needed surgery again but he said he would know after my ultrasound. He said that we could probably discuss my ultrasound over the phone.

As my mom  helped re-snap my pants, I thought about how easily they threw around the word “bursa.”  I had never heard that word before today.   I  thought about the ease with which they threw around really smart sounding words like “bursa” and was a bit  blown away.

I told Brad all about my appointment with Dr. Frush when I got to ATI.   I told him about my upcoming ultrasound and about the smart words they kept throwing around. Brad said that we would not do the stands until after my ultrasound just to be on the safe side and I was kind of glad because my knee hurt.

It’s a different kind of “hurt” than it was before my surgery. Well, I guess it’s the same “hurt” but in a different place. I still awaken in pain this morning but it was on the inside of my knee not on the outside or the middle.   It frustrates me that almost a year later I am still dealing with pain and still have to take pain medication for it because it’s that unbearable! I never take pain medication! But I do now!

Brad rubbed my knee out really good, concentrating on the inside where it hurt. As Larry was hooking me up for ice and stim., he talked with Nicole who was at the table next to me working on another client. They were talking about tomorrow being Deeds’ last day.

I was shocked and saddened by this news!  I worked with Deeds probably my second time at Barwis. Even though I did not work with him, he was always there being funny! It’s crazy how much things  have changed at Barwis since I  have not been there! Mike Morfitt is gone and now Deeds.   I am completely heartbroken!

I worked with Luba  yesterday and  is she unsnapped my pants, she told me that, “Adam says hi!”  I was surprised at this statement and responded with, “Awww Adam!!! … Phil!!!”  She looked at me questioningly and I always forget that nobody really knew that I called Adam, “Phil.”   She had seen him at Kristen’s wedding and then she asked me why I call him “Phil.”

My mind automatically went back some for years ago when I worked with him and Jesse at the Kaiser machine  for the first time. For some reason after this session, I was at the front desk talking with Dusty and Jesse.   Adam sat in the chair next to me and I asked him his name.   He kind of smiled at me and slightly shook his head. I thought I heard Jesse call him Phil when we were working at the Kaiser machine so I told him that I will call him “Phil.”   He laughed and told me his name was Adam. I think that may have been the day that Dusty, Dan, Jesse, and Adam named me “Daisy.”  Silly boys!

Before we started working, Luba talked with me and my mom about possibly using a slide board to help me transfer  and then she started working on my knee. After  working it a bit, see attached the belt to my ankle and put me in traction for a while. I didn’t feel really good and I couldn’t figure out why.   Maybe it was the weather, (it was a little bit rain-y).

She told me to lift my left leg up after she put my knee and one of the Styrofoam tubes. I swear my leg felt like it weighed 500 pounds!   I tried a number of times and it was not budging! Yep. Just what I thought, 500 pounds!  She thought for a moment and since my leg was not moving, she began pressing her fingers  down my shin and a little bit on my quad. I got movement right after this! She told me that it was reflexive  and watched how my leg moved.   She told me that it was my spinal cord sending the signals and not my brain so it was a ” spinal cord reflex loop.”

I had her repeat that phrase a few times and told her that it sounded very professional. She said she had to look up what it was really called; but it kind of stunk that my brain was not communicating with my leg to get it to move rather it was just my spinal cord.   The spinal cord is part of the central nervous system so I guess I’ll take it.  With MS, my central nervous system is all out of whack!

I looked up what the reflex was really cold and it is a reflex arc or knee-jerk reflex arc.

The Reflex Arc
Harvard University › mcb › outreach › R…
A motor neuron carries the message from the central nervous system to the effector. In a knee-jerk reflex arc the sensory neuron directly connects to the motor neuron in the spinal cord. This is called a simple reflex arc. from the spindle (receptor) to where it connects with the motor neuron in the spinal cord.

Wikipedia:

“The patellar reflex is a clinical and classic example of the monosynaptic reflex arc. There is no interneuron in the pathway leading to contraction of the quadriceps muscle. Instead the bipolar sensory neuron synapses directly on a motor neuron in the spinal cord.”

Whatever it’s called, I just want my brain to communicate with my leg muscles  like it used to rather than just my spine!  Looking up all of these technical terms reminded me of looking up “proprioceptor” at Adam’s suggestion and taking that quiz which I failed.