Category: A Bit Of Randomness

This category is full of randomness that really doesn’t fit nicely into any of the categories having to do with my road to walking.

#MyGirlL: Savage

I have come to realize that #MyGirlL is a savage!!! Now, I did not come to realize this until much later in the day but let me explain to you what happened. It all started while I was sleeping and my Mom was going to take Leia out for a walk. She harnessed her up and opened the door and left but upon opening the door, there were three squirrels on my porch!!! My girl was NOT going to stand for that! They scurried across the porch but Leia was able to get a hold of one of them!

I did not know any of this while I was sleeping. All I heard was my Mom’s urgent screams but I could not understand what she was saying and then the door closed. I grabbed my phone that my Mom put by my side and tried to call her immediately! My mom answered the phone and told me that she was okay but Leia got a squirrel.

it was the only hours later that I heard the story second hand while my Mom was on the phone with my aunt Lola. They talked of pictures and once they were off of the phone, I asked my Mom for them. My Mom sent me two pictures and I laughed when I received them!

in this picture, Leia is staring at the squirrel she just attacked because I have since learned that she got a hold of one of the squirrels and shook it until my Mom told her to drop it so it was able to get away. For anyone who knows my Mom, you know that she is NOT savage! Leia missed out on her first kill because my Mom told her to drop it! Sean loved hearing the story when my Mom told him and my brothers told us that Leis was down to fight because when we got her, there was a rat in the garage and she sniffed it out and it hissed st her but we haven’t seen it since.

You see the stare of an animal who wishes to have killed the animal that is running up and down the telephone pole!:

The second picture that my Mom sent to me was a picture of my porch and the crime scene! Leia’s mouth was bleeding but she did not flinch once my Mom cleaned it. Sean thinks that it was the squirrel who was bleeding so much but we will find out soon enough I guess.

I guess that #MyGirlL is a savage and I kind of like that!

To the End

So, I had to do this today because I cannot move the plunger down in my Chapstick and I didn’t want to waste it::


I HAVE TO finish it to the end! (Just like Christian Wolff in The Accountant) I have only realized that I do that now that as my disease has progressed as far as it has. I am pretty much homebound now. I only leave my house when I have doctor appointments in person. I have virtual doctor appointments now that Covid is a thing.

I also leave my house once a month to get my haircut and my eyebrows waxed. But the woman who cuts my hair and waxes my eyebrows just had a baby so I was not able to get a haircut or my eyebrows waxed. I’m going on March 9, just in time for my birthday!

But, I pride myself in finishing it to the end. Simple pleasures! But, there was one instance where I ruined it by smashing the cap on the broken plunger of Chapstick. I think of that as my one B+ in grad school. I got one of those! But, in my defense, that same semester I also got an A+, so on my transcripts it’s like I got an A- instead of a B+. That really doesn’t matter because no one ever looked at my transcripts even when I got hired into my one and only ”Big Girl” job.

This is 40…

So, this is my final week of being 39. I’m really excited for my birthday on Saturday! This is going to be a BIG birthday!

I have just changed my sleeping position and I think it’s kind of bothering me! I have two things going on with me! Not only am I about to be 40, I have had MS for over 21 years. I never would have thought that sleeping would become difficult but it has! I remember sleeping in my bed in my second apartment like I was a vampire.

By that I mean that I do NOT roll over in bed. I just laid on my back for the entire night, until my alarm would go off so I would get up and get ready for work. It was not until I moved into our house and I started going to Barwis that that changed. I stopped sleeping like a vampire and started moving around in bed and sleeping on my side and even sometimes on my stomach for a short time.

I was working with Michael Rhoades and still working out at Barwis and I remember talking about the fact that The front of my hips were hurting. We talked about that happening because I was seated in a wheelchair all day long. He told me that I should lay on my stomach for at least 10 minutes before I fall asleep. He said that that would ease the fact that my muscles are contracted all day long.

From the day he told me that, I would lay on my stomach before I would ultimately sleep on my side. Then I hurt my knee again and it was impossible for me to lay on my stomach with my Injured and surgically repaired knee so I stopped doing it for a while. But now that I am almost five years post surgery, I can lay on my stomach again. But now, there’s a new wrinkle, I no longer can control my body enough to move around in bed. For the past two days, I have reverted back to sleeping like a vampire because it has also been just over five years since I’ve worked out at fBarwis.

Lsst night as I was staring at my ceiling before falling asleep, I could hear raindrops on my windows and roof and I thought of this song as a eventually drifted off to sleep. I remember buying this CD single from Fairlane mall when I was in high school:

I have never watched the entire movie This is 40 because I figured set I wasn’t 40 yet so I still had time to watch it but now I am going to be 40 so I guess I better do it! I’ve heard it’s funny, but it’s totally like me to be late to the party!

“Survival Mode”

I was talking with my Mom yesterday and I don’t remember but somehow I gave the answer of, ”That’s because I am in, “Survival Mode” now.” I think it was about me going somewhere. After I said that, tears started welling in my eyes.

The real weight of that statement hit me and because I have PBA, I cry a lot and there are many times that my Mom will ask me why am crying and I will answer, “I don’t know!”

I COMPLETELY knew WHY I was crying but I just let the tears flow and let my Mom believe that I had no control over them. It is extremely difficult to realize that so much in life I cannot partake in anymore. I did however, get a haircut yesterday!

I got the haircut and two eyebrows for my 40th birthday on Saturday and I’m excited about that! But, because I left the house yesterday, I have to recover today. The back of my sweatshirt is itching me but I can’t even attend to that! I may be in, “Survival Mode” now but I have standards!!!

My “Birthday Eve”

From the moment I woke up, I was struggling to get ahead of my pain and discomfort! NOT The “Birthday Eve”that I wanted!!! It took my entire prayer time today to begin to overcome it. I put on my Apple Music playlist to try to relax a little more.

Well, it worked! I just clicked with what was playing last night and when this song started, I was back in my first apartment and we had just moved in! I was in the kitchen making dinner and checking on the wash that was just off of the kitchen.

On days like today, I like being able to escape to my memories because I can crystal clearly see myself walking around my first department! So it’s in these moments that I can escape to my memories to be able to handle the reality of what is happening right now. That, being my pain.

This song sparked my memory and I’ve been living in it for a while now!:

This is the last post of my 30s!!!

A Nickname

I remember my Mom telling me once when I was young that she chose the name Jennifer because it was the most popular name the year I was born and she liked the fact that I could be called Jennifer, Jenny, and Jen.

I have been called all three of those names throughout my life and all very different situations! My family, calls me, ‘Jenny.’ If you knew me in either grade or high school, I was also known as, ‘Jenny.’ It wasn’t until college that I started introducing myself as ‘Jennifer’ because people were not understanding when I introduced myself as, ‘Jenny.’ My cousinT, Shannon, calls me ‘Jennifer.’ I received birthday wishes yesterday using all three of those names! It’s totally comfortable for me because that is how they knew me. I’m mostly, ‘Jen,’ now that I’m 40.

But there is one name, a nickname that I was given by one of my older brothers when I was 13. My brothers have always called me crazy and mean names but I didn’t really think about it when he called me this so I didn’t pay much attention. But, I did not think that this nickname would stick all the way to my 40th birthday celebration! But, it did. I am a 40-year-old woman who has been called this for the past 27 years and I guess I really don’t think anything about it which is kind of nuts!:

I AM 40 Now, so…

I have known four years, almost a decade I think that anytime I get together with my family, I need a day to recover afterward. Well, now I am 40 so … it’s looking like I will need two days to recover because yeah, I still need a little more time to recover but I will leave you with these pics from my “2 Sacreds” celebrating with me:

i’ve just been trying to collect myself since celebrating and I have been listening to my U2 playlist on Apple Music on shuffle and I heard this one and it made me smile and remember going to a comedy show downtown on a double date:

So, all I have been doing for the past couple days is trying to recover from the excitement of all of the birthday wishes on Facebook and on Twitter. But, I am 40 now so… seems like it’s taking a little longer now.

48° is NOT Warm

So here is the deal, I finished my Vanilla Bean Chapstick The night before my birthday;

I was thinking about switching over to my Pomegranate chapstick because it will be after my birthday and spring is coming. But, the night before my birthday, it was 19°. So, on my birthday, I opened my other Vanilla Bean chapstick.

My Mom told me that today it is 48° outside and 48° is NOT warm for me. Even today, I still am wearing winter hats in my house and my thermostat is set at 73°. I blame that on a couple of things but my disease progression is not helping and the fact that my windows getting older isn’t helping either. I have a doctor’s appointment on March18 so maybe I will smell spring and will change over to pomegranate then but for now, it’s still cold so, Vanilla Bean it is.

#MyGirlL: My Barometer

So, my Mom took this picture of Leiafter their walk:

My Mom told me that the weather was beautiful outside and we laughed at Leia resting because it was so warm. But I told my Mom that I am STILL cold! Tomorrow, I have a doctor’s appointment so I will need to leave my house. If Leia is my barometer, maybe I need to change chapsticks…