Month: July 2025

I am actually at a loss! My head is spinning! But I seem to just be handling things. For example, I woke up to a pretty big hospital bill! That obviously freaks me out! But I need to wait until after I took my Prilosec, waited 30 minutes, and then drank my nutrition shake (because I have gastritis now).

It’s only after I drink my nutrition shake that I can begin to make sense of the day. I called Henry Ford. I spoke to a woman named Amber. I told her that I had just updated my payment plan with Keith last week so what’s going on?!

Here’s the deal, I had an ultrasound in January. That’s when they found out that I have a calculus in my bladder. Then. In March, I had a urogram and with that charge, I made a payment plan to pay for that which was $200?! Then, I had my procedures in the end of June and that was a whole lot of money so I extended my payment plan with Keith.

Amber explained to me that he updated my payment plan based on my June 25 procedures. And the bill I received today was for my July 15 cystoscopy.

She updated my payment plan one more time. But thinking about it, I have a virtual appointment with my neurologist tomorrow. It’s my annual appointment and I have a whole lot of things to tell her about!!! I’m sure that she will read about all of it before I see her or as I am seeing her.

Then, I have an appointment with my optometrist on the 5th and then I see Dr. K on the 13th to discuss what’s going to happen with my bladder going forward. Amber told me to call when I get another email that tells me about another charge. So I will be getting one soon with both my virtual neurology appointment and my appointment with Dr. K at urology in August.

I just want to let everyone know that I will be paying Henry Ford for the next 14 months! I can’t believe all of this and it’s still hot as hell!!! I can’t wait until the ‘Ber months so then I can really think about this because heat is not helping at all on top of the fact of having MS for 24 years, things are getting serious now! And I think of that just like grandmother Willow talking about Kokoum:

Things are getting so serious now and I don’t know what to do!!! I will see my neurologist tomorrow while I’m seated in my living room.

I was cleaning out my email boxes tonight and I got this one from the Rams:

I would watch that Top 100 players every single year and I never saw him on the list! I texted this picture to both Sean and my friend Bert and told them, “You KNOW I will take that!!!

But I don’t even watch football anymore. That’s a statement that I never thought that I would make. But, 24 years in, I have optic neuritis in both eyes and it’s only getting worse. #MSsucks!!! 😒😒😒…

I had a little bit of difficulty filling my pillbox last night. So much so, I ordered this today:

I am overlooking the fact that they allowed the days to be out of order and that kind of drives me nuts! I was already thinking one way about changing my pill box when I saw this picture which confirmed it:

I already thought that I was old having to change my pill box. This picture confirmed it because of that man is old! Probably at least 20 or 30 years older than me!

But my pill box is feeling over-stuffed so ‘something’s gotta give’ and you have to do what you have to do. It really stinks that it makes me feel old and sick!!!

I e-checked in for my appointment next Friday. Its virtual. I have been going to see my neurologist for 24 years. Today was the first day that I ever was asked this question and it floored me. I have been feeling that too! I remember feeling it BEFORE I was diagnosed and standing in my dorm room at WMU. Here’s the question:

I do need to clarify that the electric sensation that I feel shoots down my arms and ends in my pinkies. It feels like my funnybone has just been hit. So it DEFINITELY does not feel good! I just think it’s crazy that I have JUST been asked this question and I’ve been seeing these people for 24 years?!

So, I have been constantly thinking about this and trying to make sense of it! Now, after 24 years of having MS, it’s necessary for me to have these outpatient procedures.

These outpatient procedures are usually early in the morning! That does NOT work out for me after 24 years of having MS.

The night before my procedure, I just don’t go to bed. I spend the evening reclined in my wheelchair. I will pray or listen to the Bible. If I lay in my bed, I’ve already relaxed way too much and I need to be alert!

My Mom took a picture of me when I was waiting for this last outpatient procedure/surgery. I am no longer 12 years old! At 43, an all nighter looks a little bit different!!!:

I got my haircut the day after this procedure, which I still don’t know what I was thinking, scheduling it like that, but I have forehead wrinkles now too.

My Mom got a phone call today. It was Dr. Cerghet’s office (my neurologist) to tell me that there was a cancellation and to see if I could see her today at 1:30. She told me that when I woke up today.

I thanked her for telling them that I need to be on top of my game for that appointment and that I was still sleeping so will not take the new appointment. I will keep my appointment for August 5.

I have NEVER expected it to be like this! I have entered into such a complicated dance! That’s my ENTIRE life now. I tell my Mom that all the time. It doesn’t make me angry or even sad; but I NEVER expected it!

It startles me and KEEPS startling me! For example, my Mom needs to reschedule my colonoscopy because I sleep in too late (it’s beyond my control now ) and she’s my caregiver. We were told to call back at the end of July to reschedule for the beginning of October.

So, my Mom did that today and I texted her all the dates that were possible for October. But here’s where it gets complicated, I need to stop taking my supplements for 10 days prior to my next colonoscopy. But I have a September 23 appointment with my naturopath to dose me for a supplement that will help with my gastritis.

And, to further complicate things, I rent a van to go to the Cider Mill every October! I think that will be the fourth year that we are doing it and Sean is going to come this time!

This is a dance that I NEVER wanted to be a part of, nor did I EVER think that I would be, but I am. I don’t even think it’s begrudgingly…. It’s not like that. It’s just how it is.