This morning, well this afternoon, I was out of my bed, and I had already drank my nutrition shake. I was squeezing my therapy putty as I do every morning as I was listening to a rosary.
Then, I had a thought. An 18-year-old thought and then from before that. The first thought I had was more than 18 years ago. Thanksgiving at our house. I am remembering my Dad carving the turkey.
My Parents tag-teamed making the turkey every year. I have never had a bad turkey! One of us kids, usually one of ‘the three little ones,’ would sit next to my Dad as he was taking the turkey off the bone. He would sit there methodically working in silence except for one word. He would stop for a moment and say, “Open” and one of us kids would open up the big roaster my Mom had to keep the 12 to 15 pounds of turkey meat in.
We would open the lid and my Dad would put hot, freshly cut hot turkey in it. We always were able to sneak a piece every time before he told us to close it! It was only when we took too much that my Dad would say, “Hey, now” or something like that.
I was thinking fondly of that, as I was squeezing my therapy putty And then I thought of my first Thanksgiving without my Dad. I remember that I was at my Mom’s house and Sean was not with me because he was with his dad because it was too sad for me!
I think it was just my oldest brother and his girlfriend at the time, my Mom, and me. I remember when it was almost time for dinner that my older brother was sitting in my Dad’s seat, kind of with a pained look at his face.
I didn’t understand why he was making that face until he took the knife and the sharpener and clicked them above his head just like my Dad did every single Thanksgiving of my life!
I remember that I started to bawl just like I did this morning and the 18 year old memory. I can still hear my Dad say, “Open.”