The day before yesterday, with the commotion of dismantling my bed, I was not able to put my tens unit on as early as I would have liked. So, once it was put on and I took my ibuprofen, I was chasing the pain all day. It felt as if someone was squeezing the back of my eyeballs. Yesterday, the pain continued even though I was able to put my tens unit on my knee shortly after I woke up.
Yesterday, I was not sure if it was an MS pain or my knee pain because my knee hurt a lot and my body hurt just as badly. Apparently, the pain I feel is evident on my face even though I try my very best to hide it. Yesterday, while my Mom was attaching the sticky pads to my knee, hot tears leaked out of my eyes. They were silent and I could not stop them. I did not say anything to my Mom but just wiped my eyes with the left sleeve of my T-shirt.
Once everything was situated, I sat in front of my TV yesterday and watched football all day. Three games. ALL of my teams lost. I’ve been told that everything hurts more when you lose and my body continued to hurt yesterday so might be true.
It was during the second game that my son said to me, “I’m sorry mom. You don’t deserve this.” I guess that my pain was apparent on my face but I did not trust myself to say anything in response for fear of crying.
It’s been a rough three days for me. I would hope that yesterday was the worst because today I feel a little bit better but still have a headache and feel almost hung over. I don’t think I deserve this either but this is how it is.